Be Happy!
Day 94 of 100: Be Happy! If you don’t FEEL HAPPY, then Fake it ’til you Make it! Act happy, exaggerate enthusiasm, move your body, smile, move, sing, dance. Tell your body that you’re happy… and if you do it long enuf, it might just believe you! Enjoy!- Matt
Imagine No Possessions
Day 93 of 100: What would it be like to have only yourself? So many of the New Orleans-area Katrina victims were left with what? NOTHING. Absolutely, 100% Nothing but the CLOTHES they were wearing. No possessions (can you imagine? I wonder if you can.) They had nothing, right? What else did these survivors carry [...]
Growth Path
Day 92 of 100: Where are you along your path? Here are 5 stages I came up with re: personal growth and development. The bottom stage is where you are still living in, and controlled by, your past. The top stage has cleaned-up most ALL of your past and are boldly and cleanly venturing into [...]
Behavior Modification
Day 91 of 100: How our Behaviours are Created. Here’s how our brain works. There are 2 sides of the brain, the Left hemisphere and the Right hemisphere. The Left side handles logic, thought and reason, known as the Cognitive side. The Right side is for pictures, sound and feelings, known as the Affective side. [...]
Emotional Toolbox
Day 90 of 100: What is an Emotional Toolbox, and how do we use it? When we notice that stuff is broken or tweaked or loose, we try to fix it (or find someone who can), right? Then, once it gets irritating enough, we decide we are gonna do something about it. Assuming we have [...]
Shock and Confusion
Day 89 of 100: Can we actually "choose" whether to we feel Shocked, or Confused? The idea that "we can choose our feelings" isn’t exactly accurate. All feelings come from perceptions, decisions, conclusions, expectations and beliefs that we have garnered throughout our lifetime. So, it’s not a matter of choosing whether to feel shocked or [...]
Dealing with Feelings
Day 88 of 100: How do you deal with negative feelings? We call it "sitting through" the feelings. When something really negative comes up for you (like sadness, fear, guilt, or anger), sometimes it’s best not to DO anything with it, at all. Just "sit through" the feeling. Like with Urges, most feelings will pass, [...]
Almost There
Day 87 of 100: We’re almost done with this series. Well, we’re on Day 87, and almost done with this series of Emotional Lessons (thanks for hangin’ in there with me!). So, as we say at our powerful ND class…NOW WHAT?!? Now that we know all this cool info and have these new skills, Now [...]
Denial and Defensiveness
Day 86 of 100: What’s our purpose in defending ourselves? I have come to believe that being Defensive is a waste of time. If I am wrong, I need to learn from it.If I am right, right is it’s own defense. So what’s the purpose of our denial? Is it that we can’t handle the [...]
How we Learn
Day 85 of 100: There are steps we go through in learning anything new. The 4 Steps to Learning 1. Unconsciously Incompetent (we don’t know that we don’t know) 2. Consciously Incompetent (we find out that we don’t know) 3. Consciously Competent (we find out how to know) 4. Unconsciously Competent (we know without having [...]
Acceptance
Day 84 of 100: Can you accept other people’s Reality, even if you don’t Agree with it? "Feelings need to be Accepted… but Acceptance does not necessarily mean Approval." – Doc Downing, Ph.D, LMFT Each one of us has our own reality, ones we have created out of our beliefs, values, expectations and conclusions about [...]
Know your Feelings, Know your Self!
Day 83 of 100: How aware are you? "If you know what you Feel, you’ll know who you are and what you want!" – Doc Downing, Ph.D, LMFT "Who am I?" "What am I doing here?" "What is my life about?" These are basic questions that we’ve all had to answer at some point in [...]
10 Ways to Live Longer
Day 82 of 100: Hints on How your Feelings can help your Life 10 ways to live longer Great Article According to Forbes, below are some practical ways to live longer, healthier lives. And Yes, most have to do with FEELING better = Live Longer. 5 out of 10 are feeling-based and ALL are behavior [...]
Laughter helps, Depression hurts
Day 81 of 100: Physically, there really are Good feelings and Bad feelings. Laughter helps, Depression hurts A daily dose of laughter may be good for the heart because, like exercise, it makes blood vessels work more efficiently, U.S. researchers reported. Depression, on the other hand, can raise the risk of dying from heart failure, [...]
Turning Anger into Love
Day 80 of 100: Can we turn our Anger into Love? It’s not: I love you but I’m angry with you. It’s: I love you and I’m angry with you. both can exist at the same time. remove the anger and what’s left, the Love. Remember, we wouldn’t get so angry at the people in [...]
Feelings go Up and Down
Day 79 of 100: Feel the Contrast Joy and Sorrow "Life is the coexistence of all opposite values. Joy and sorrow, pleasure and pain, up and down, hot and cold, here and there, light and darkness, birth and death. All experience is by contrast, and one would be meaningless without the other." – Deepak Chopra [...]
Ready to Get some Help?
Day 78 of 100: Let’s help you break-through your fear, doubts and limiting beliefs. Does your life feel out of control? Is your past dragging you down? Ready to "deal with" your Feelings and move on? If you can’t make it out to California for our amazing ND class, you can still get many of [...]
Anger is a Secondary Feeling
Day 77 of 100: Anger is NOT a primary feeling! Of your body’s primary feelings (including fear, sadness, physical pain, joy, peace, love, etc) anger is not one of them. Anger is what we call a ‘secondary feeling’, in that: "You will always feel something first, BEFORE you feel anger." – Doc Downing, Ph.D., LMFT [...]
Being There for Others
Day 76 of 100: How to "Be There" for Others. If you know that you will get your needs met – sometime, some place – you can put your own needs aside for a minute and "be there" for the important people in your life. The #1 most important part of Being There is to [...]
Reaching Out
Day 75 of 100: How & why do we reach out to others? Ok, so you’re aware that: You have issues. You are not alone. (other people have issues, too.) Some other people have answers. Love and connections are some of the keys to a happy, healthy life. CONGRATS, ’cause Awareness is the 1st key [...]
Visualize it!
Day 74 of 100: You can make it happen in your life. "People who soar are those who refuse to sit back, sigh and wish things would change. They neither complain of their lot nor passively dream of some distant ship coming in. Rather, they visualize in their minds that they are not quitters; they [...]
Happy Birthday to me!
Day 73 of 100: Yes, today is my 46th birthday — Yeehaa!! ~=:c ) I feel old, and young, at the same time. I’m young at heart — love to play, and laugh, especially with kiddos and friends. But I’m also kinda stiff and creeky sometimes (even tho’ I can play [...]
The Purposes of Anger
Day 72 of 100: There are 3 Purposes to Anger. To Manipulate – "Hey! Stay out of the Street!" To Feel Better – Venting, energy release, relief To Keep People Away – "Back off, buddy!" Get to know your anger. Make friends with it, and use it wisely!
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