ND in MD?

Q:  Matt and Paula, Wow, this sounds like a great weekend! What would it take, in terms of students and space to have you give a weekend workshop in Maryland? Blessings, Alison
A:  Not that much, really, Alison. Not that much, at all… [...]

Twitters Away!

Ok, sorry, I haven't been posting because I've been Twitterin' and Tweetin'.  It's fun.
follow me.  #MattPerelstein
(wow, that's a cool statement, "follow me", for that means I have somewhere to take you…  And that I do… follow me… into the depths inside us.  our feelings, our heart, our passions and our soul.)

Be Honest With Yourself!

"No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself, and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be true."

 - Nathaniel Hawthorne

"You cannot fake a relationship and feel right with yourself or anyone else. Changing yourself to fit what you think other people want doesn’t work. [...]

Inspired Living

Together, as Americans, let's create the emotional support network to teach the world that EQ > IQ. Will you help?

When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bonds; your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new, great and wonderful world. [...]

EQ > IQ !!

that's it!that's what I want to say to the world…

EQ > IQ !!

High IQ is cool.High EQ is better.
Feelings are more important than thoughts.Feelings are us.Feelings can and will have more effect on our life.We are our Feelings.
And we can actually Make ourselves Smarter about our feelings…… that will effect us every second and every [...]

Propaganda

T-shirts for us, not them.
I'd like to make "stuff" – T-shirts, cups, pens, etc – with some cool sayings we have.

EQ > IQ

Feelings are Good!
Guilt is Optional.
Anger is second. What do you really feel?
Don't Eat That, find something better.
It's OK to have Boundaries.
I am not a Control Freak.
FEAR is Ok. Keep Going… [...]

The terrorists are winning…

Our country is a mess.
People feel alone.
People feel afraid.
People feel powerless.
Suicide rates are up.
The economy is bad, and getting worse.
People are really hurting.
But, I believe we can do something about it.
In general, we Americans are fairly clueless about how to handle, and manage, our Feelings & Emotions, yet…
Emotional Intelligence is the #1 key to Happiness, [...]

Let’s build the safest, most effective Emotional Support Network ever created!

10 Premises to Changing the World
1. Emotional Intelligence is the key to happiness, sanity and success in life. (EQ > IQ)
2. We all have 100% control over our choices in what we feel, and how we view the world.
3. It’s more fun if we do this life thing Together.
4. True emotional support is about [...]

Feelings are a Good Thing!

“Character isn’t inherited. One builds it daily by the way one thinks and acts, thought by thought, action by action. If one lets fear or hate or anger take possession of the mind, they become self-forged chains.”
- Helen Douglas
“Too often we underestimate how quickly our feelings are going to change because we underestimate [...]

Giving is the key!

Aspire to inspire before you expire.

Believe in Yourself

“We cannot rise higher than our thought of ourselves.”
- Orison Swett Marden
“We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us something is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience [...]

Feelings are the Key!

Helping you understand how emotions have a direct and profound effect on how well you perform on the job and in life, this book presents great techniques to advance emotional self-awareness and tips on building self-esteem and confidence.
- By Jeff Feldman and Karl Mulle (Books24×7)
Put Emotional Intelligence to Work: Equip Yourself for Success

Waving Wednesday

The #1 easiest way to bring a smile to someone’s face, with the least effort from you, is to WAVE to them. Yes, just smile a bit and move your hand back and forth, and PRESTO! you could make someone’s day.
So, it’s Waving Wednesday.
Wave to someone you don’t know.
Everyone wins.

Caring for Ourselves, first

When we truly care for ourselves, it becomes possible to care far more profoundly about other people. The more alert and sensitive we are to our own needs, the more loving and generous we can be towards others.
- Eda LeShan
Anything good for you brings out the best in you and does not force you to [...]

Anger Management Skills That Work

Anger issues affect individuals from childhood to adulthood, and it is necessary to teach anger management skills that work for every age group.
One skill that tends to help people deal with negative emotions is acupressure….
Adopting positive anger management skills might involve keeping a journal….
Removing yourself from a threatening situation might eliminate the problem….
Adopting anger [...]

Get High on Happiness

‘Knowing Thyself’ Can Lead to Happiness
Powerful tools to a joyous life are being in touch with your inner self, God, and spirituality.
Imagine you bought a new car and after six months it starts to get very sluggish. You take it to the mechanic and he recommends a good wash and wax.
“What? Are you [...]

Understanding Emotions Improves Our Food Choices

Pictures Of Hot Fudge Sundaes Arouse Emotions!
Authors Blair Kidwell, David M. Hardesty, and Terry L. Childers (all University of Kentucky) examined the “emotional intelligence” of consumers, including obese people. They found that people who made the healthiest choices had high correlations between their emotional intelligence and confidence in their emotional intelligence—what the authors call “emotional [...]

Who uses Emotional Intelligence in Business?

The answer … we all do!
Our emotions help us to adapt and make sense of situations.
The evidence that an individual’s feelings affects others and that these feelings in turn affect performance highlights the importance of being aware of and managing our emotions. Leaders, salespeople, parents – anyone concerned with their influence on others.
Individuals Are [...]

CEOs Value EQ over IQ

“How bosses train to be the best”
Generally, CEOs assume there is a certain base level of IQ among all corporate leaders. Most therefore value emotional intelligence (EQ) over IQ as a way of discriminating between great leaders. However, with a few notable exceptions, CEOs do not have a deep understanding of emotional intelligence and have [...]

To love and Be loved

There is only one happiness in life: to love and be loved.
- George Sand

Emotions

“No other personal characteristic of the Self has such a clear line of connection to the Soul than emotions.”
“Anger is a legitimate feeling and emotional expression. We can use anger to help and heal or we can use anger to manipulate and destroy. Anger can distance us from others. Anger can connect us to others. [...]

Choices

Our lives are a sum total of the choices we have made.
- Wayne Dyer
This may be new information for some folks! But it’s true that we are where we are, and who we are, due to the choices we have made in the past. We may be pleased with some of [...]

Learn to be Aware

“You can live a lifetime and, at the end of it, know more about other people than you know about yourself.”
- Beryl Markham
Who am I? What’s important to me? What do I feel strongest about? To answer this, we must first learn to become more aware of ourselves and our feelings. [...]

Spam Posts

I’m sorry, but my account it getting spammed, daily.
I’m in contact with TypePad tech support, and we’re taking every step to try to stop it, but have been unsuccessful so far.
If you’re a Feedblitz subscriber who gets an email of each past, please bear with us as we get this security breach plugged and ths [...]

Be Kind to Yourself

Perfectionism is self-abuse of the highest order.
Ann Wilson Schaef

2Get, Give!

2GiveHelp.com (proposed)
2Give, without Sacrifice
2Give, without Guilt
2Give, without Burden
you wanna REALLY enjoy your life… Give.
you wanna feel REALLY loved, and appreciated… Give.
you want to have TONS of friends, and people who know you and Like you… Give.
We can show you how…

Feelings are the Bomb!

I’m gonna make a Bold statement here…
are you ready…

Our Feelings & Emotions
are THE most important thing
in our Entire Lives!

“Feelings provide us with vital and potentially profitable information every minute of the day. This feedback from the heart, and not the head, is what ignites creative genius, keeps you honest with yourself, shapes trusting [...]

The 7 Steps to Healing our Feelings

How to Take Control of your Feelings and Emotions, One Step at a time.
By Matt Perelstein
July, 2008
Follow these 7 Simple (tho’ not Easy) steps to learn to “Deal with” your feelings & emotions, completely, effectively, and beautifully –
1 Awareness that we do Feel, a Lot: Get a Clue about the importance/depth of our feelings [...]

Do yourself a Favor!

“You cannot create experience. You must undergo it. “
- Albert Camus, 1913-1960, French Author and Philosopher
Wanna do yourself the biggest favor?
Want to give yourself the very best possible gift you can?
Get yourself to the New Directions workshop this weekend in Fresno, CA.
“Ordinarily, everything we do is in our self-interest. Everything.”
- Anthony [...]

Emotional Intelligence is the key!

Less Crazy, More Sane.
Less Different, More Same.
More Power. Less Blame.
More Joy, Less Pain.
- mcp

Emotional Intelligence can Help!

“We’re learning that emotional intelligence is an important ingredient in helping professional athletes live healthy and successful lives.”
“There is a massive correlation between high EQ skills and life success.”
- Gene Upshaw, Executive Director, National Football League NFL Players Association, Emotional Intelligence Helps NFL Players “Win at Life”
Improved EQ can help in sports, in business, in [...]

Know Thyself

The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.
- Carl Rogers
The greatest happiness is to know the source of our unhappiness.
- Dostoyevsky

You can heal your life

Awareness is the first step in healing or change.
- Louise Hay
What we think, and what we believe, is what will come true for us.
Our thoughts create our lives.
It’s that simple.
And when we get that,
we can make enormous changes.
- Louise Hay
“You can heal your life” DVD

Life Rules

Life only has 3 rules
Paradox
Life is a mystery, don’t waste time trying to figure it out
Humor
It is a strength beyond all measure.
Change
Know that nothing stays the same.
- Dan Millman, “Way of the Peaceful Warrior”

Extreme Emotional Makeover – Summer Intensive

Announcement:
We are sponsoring a powerful program this summer, to show the world how much learning and growth can happen in very short period of time!
If you are chosen, you will be given intensive therapy, life coaching, reading materials, 2 weekend workshops, emotional support, and more, to help you BLAST thru your emotional issues [...]

Happiness — it’s up to you!

“If you expect the best, you will be the best. Learn to use one of the most powerful laws in this world;
change your mental habits to belief instead of disbelief. Learn to expect, not to doubt. In so doing, you bring everything into the realm of possibility.”
- Dr. Norman Vincent Peale
“No pessimist ever [...]

Emotional Choices

Most of us have more choices, emotionally, than we ever thought possible!

“When we know that the cause of something is in ourselves, and that we (ourselves) are one of the few things in the universe that we have the right and ability to change, we begin to get a sense of the choices we really [...]

Confrontation: Everyone Hates it!

Want to get over your fear of confrontation? Learn how at Emotional Intelligence – Confronting What’s True
See also the Blog link on EQ At Work for lots of cool tools and articles re: EQ.
… and remember, and Dr. Phil says, “Attitude is Everything!”:
Victor Frankel, who faced death daily in a Nazi [...]

Laughter is good for your body!

No Joke: This Is Exercise
Laugh away ticker trouble.
from here.
University of Maryland Medical Center researchers showed 20 healthy adults two movie scenes–one from the comedy Kingpin, the other a battle scene from Saving Private Ryan–while monitoring artery function. After viewing the funny clip, the volunteers’ blood vessels dilated by 22%; they constricted by 35% after the [...]

PTSD: Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

extremely common in soldiers returning from war…
from http://www.thesoldiersproject.org
Signs of possible trouble (Service Member)
Irritability, jumpiness
Anger easily and “blow up” at loved ones or friends
Feeling hyper-alert, needing to be careful, on the watch for danger
Feeling emotionally flat, uninvolved with people, distant
Feeling you can’t relate to life around you or to the concerns [...]

Laughter Heals!

Your Brain on Laughter
How clowning around improves memory, mood, and motivation
By Thomas Crook, PhD, Prevention
“A good knee-slapper produces a chemical reaction that instantly elevates your mood, reduces pain and stress, and boosts immunity (suppressed by both stress and pain). A recent fMRI study by Allan L. Reiss, MD, and colleagues at Stanford University traced this [...]

Change Your Belief System

"All personal breakthroughs begin with a change in beliefs. So how do we change? The most effective way is to get your brain to associate massive pain to the old belief. You must feel deep in your gut that not only has this belief cost you pain in the past, but it’s costing you in [...]

Love is the Answer

“Remember, in our innermost being, we are all completely lovable because spirit is love. Beyond what anyone can make you think or feel about yourself, your unconditioned spirit stands, shining with a love nothing can tarnish.”
- Deepak Chopra
————————————————————-
“When mystics use the word love, they use it very carefully — in the deeply spiritual [...]

Attraction

“The secret of attraction is to love yourself. Attractive people judge neither themselves nor others. They are open to gestures of love. They think about love, and express their love in every action. They know that love is not a mere sentiment, but the ultimate truth at the heart of the universe.”
- Deepak Chopra [...]

Fear: How to Manage it!

When fears arise, use this quick acceptance process:
1. Acknowledge and really feel your fear without judging and criticizing yourself.
2. Ask what it’s there to tell you. Be alert for inner messages that will bring you greater understanding of the situation.
3. Be fully present. Are [...]

Find Something Positive!

“Make a game of finding something positive in every situation. Ninety-five percent of your emotions are determined by how you interpret events to yourself.”
- Brian Tracy

We’re doing it!

New office opens Thursday, May 1, as the 2GetHelp Wellness Center — Yeehaa!
MEW Foundation, Inc’s was officially declared as a Corporation by the state of California Secretary of State, and we have a federal tax ID number.
Doc Downing, PhD, LMFT, will be our first (and grandest) therapist!
We’re officially advertising for additional therapist(s) / coach(es) to [...]

Emotional Specialties

2GetHelp Wellness Center
Our new center will hereby specialize in the following:
- Depression: We have helped so many understand, fight, and win, against their depression, – going from hospital to happy – in only a year or two. This is for the girls, wives and moms of the world.
- Anger: Anger has a terrible reputation, and [...]

OMG!

Nearly 1 in 5 troops has mental problems after war service – Yahoo! News
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080418/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/troops_mental_health
WASHINGTON – Roughly one in every five U.S. troops who have survived the bombs and other dangers of Iraq and Afghanistan now suffers from major depression or post-traumatic stress, an independent study said Thursday. It estimated the toll at 300,000 or more. [...]

A new Company is Born!

As of yesterday, our new company is here to help show and tell the world about the wonders and joys of Emotional Intelligence!!
MEW Foundation, Inc.’s
2GetHelp Wellness Center
2560 West Shaw Lane, Suite 105
Fresno, CA 93711-2777
(559) 431-9995 / (559) 431-9996 (fax)
We already have a therapist on staff in the office and we’ll be getting at least [...]

You Gotta Feel It, to Heal It(2)!

“Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.”
- Albert Einstein

The Meaning of Life

Wanna find the Meaning to life?
Wanna know the Reason we are here?
Wanna find the Answers to life’s great questions?
Look inside your heart!
When we are totally in-touch with our inner-most feelings, when we truly get to Know ourselves to the deepest depths of our soul, when we find the still and the calm that exists within, [...]

Emotional Awareness

“Mindfulness means moment-to-moment, non-judgmental awareness. It is cultivated by refining our capacity to pay attention, intentionally, in the present moment, and then sustaining that attention over time as best we can. In the process, we become more in touch with our life as it is unfolding.”
- Myla & Jon Kabat-Zinn
a.k.a. Emotional Awareness

Self-Processing

I’m coining a new term,
“Self-Processing: The art and skill of Processing yourself and “resolving” your negative feelings.
Feeling Resolution is a process. a known, understood, step-by-step process that can be replicated, and measured (well, kinda).
Issues = Unresolved feelings and emotions.
- Resolving your own personal “life issues”,
- Cleaning out your emotional “system” – [...]

I don’t sing because I’m happy; I’M HAPPY because I sing.

“I don’t sing because I’m happy; I’m happy because I sing.”
- William James, 1842-1910, American Philosopher and Psychologist
—
“Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair.”
- Kahlil Gibran, 1883-1931, Lebanese Poet and Novelist

Feeling-based Medications

Top 20 Psychiatric Prescriptions for 2005
These are the top 20 psychiatric medications by number of U.S. prescriptions dispensed in 2005.
Medication Used for… U.S. Prescriptions
1. Xanax Anxiety 34,230,000
2. Zoloft Depression, anxiety 26,976,000
3. Lexapro Depression, anxiety 24,788,000
4. [...]

Let go of past pains!

“Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding [...]

Emotional Growth

instead of Personal Growth, what if we call it Emotional Growth?
it’s more descriptive and ties back in to our area of focus.
We’re all about Feelings and Emotions.
If you don’t like yours, if you think that Feelings are a bad thing… if you’re in denial about what’s happening inside you… you may want to leave here, [...]

About Emotional Intelligence

Various definitions:
“Emotional intelligence is the ability:
to perceive emotions;
to access and generate emotions so as to assist thought;
to understand emotions and emotional knowledge;
and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote emotional and intellectual growth.”
Another says there are four parts:
1. Perceive or sense emotions,
2. Use emotions to assist thought,
3. Understand emotions,
4. Manage emotions.
David [...]

Have a Child’s heart, and an Adult’s mind

“What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult.”
- Sigmund Freud
ouch… and oh sooo true! that’s why I like to hang around kids better!

I have a gripe… about Happiness.

I read a quote this morning…
“Happiness comes only when we push our brains and hearts to the farthest reaches of which we are capable.”
- Leo C. Rosten
sounds good, right?
well, I say, “BULL“. I don’t buy that.
I can choose to do nothing whatsoever, and still be totally Happy and at peace. [...]

It’s up to us, baby!

As your eyes open, you’ll see that your state of health, happiness, and every circumstance of your life has been, in large part, arranged by you — consciously or unconsciously.”
- Dan Millman
—
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest [...]

The Ultimate Freedom!

“Our ultimate freedom is the right and power to decide how anybody or anything outside ourselves will affect us.”
- Stephen Covey
————————————————————-
“Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.”
- Jean-Paul Sartre
————————————————————-
“One cannot make a slave of a free person, for a free person is free even in a prison.” [...]

Attitude is Everything!

“Happiness is an attitude of mind, born of the simple determination to be happy under all outward circumstances.”
- J. Donald Walters
—
The last of the human freedoms is to choose one’s attitudes.
- Victor Frankl
—
Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character.
– Albert Einstein
—
“If a person gets his attitude toward money straight,
it will help straighten [...]

Love is about being open!

Love is about open arms. If you close your arms about love, you will find that you are left holding only yourself.
– Leo Buscaglia
Being wide open, at all times, ain’t easy, and frankly it ain’t all that smart, either. Learn how to be open, when the time is right, or even by default, [...]

I am happy.

I have a life. I make a life. every day.
I have a great job, the best I’ve ever had. I work part-time, telecommuting from home, it pays well, is challenging, important and resume-enhancing.
I run 4 businesses:
EucProducts
ND – my fave!
Computer Consulting
building 2GH
I have a 700+ post blog, and building another.
I have [...]

What is Happiness?

Happiness is an Attitude
Happiness is a Lifestyle Choice.
Happiness is a Way of Being.
Happiness is a Skill.
Happiness is an Art.
Happiness is Classy.
Happiness has Style, and Grace, and Beauty.
Happiness is Fun, and Silly, and Skippy, and having a Blast, pretty often.
Happiness is about Allowing and Releasing Negative Feelings, to get back to the Positive ones.
Happiness is about [...]

We Must Teach People How to Be with Us

Maxim for life: You get treated in life the way you teach people to treat you.
– Wayne Dyer, American Psychotherapist/Author/Lecturer
If you think badly of yourself, others will instinctively treat you badly, too. But, if you value yourself, your opinions, your heart and your mind, others will USUALLY treat you the same way.

Emotions are the next frontier!

“By starving emotions we become humorless, rigid and stereotyped; by repressing them we become literal, reformatory and holier-than-thou; encouraged, they perfume life; discouraged, they poison it.”
- Joseph Collins
————————————————————-
“Emotions are the next frontier to be understood and conquered. To manage our emotions is not to drug them or suppress them, but to understand them so that [...]

Emotional Intelligence = Taking Control of your Life!

The difference between great people and everyone else is that great people create their lives actively, while everyone else is created by their lives, passively waiting to see where life takes them next. The difference between the two is the difference between living fully and just existing.
- Michael E. Gerber
The key is a tricky balancing [...]

Get out of your own muck and help someone else!

“An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.”
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Tired of your own pain and issues? Try reaching out to help someone else!
No matter how bad it is for you, there are [...]

Create Your World

True brilliance, Matt, is not a function of understanding one’s view of the world and finding order, logic, and spirituality in it. True brilliance is understanding that your view of order, logic, and spirituality is what created your world.
And therefore you are forever capable of changing everything.
The Universe

The Bucket List

The Bucket List, starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman.
It is bittersweet because these guys are dying of cancer, but it is also comical as they go about fulfilling the items on their list of what they want to accomplish before they “kick the bucket.”
The biggest takeaway: Don’t wait, or waste, another minute! [...]

Love is a friendship caught on fire

“Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.”
- Bruce Lee !
Love really is the answer. Whatever the question, Love should [...]

DECIDE to be Happy!

“Most people are about as happy as they make up their mind to be.”
- Abraham Lincoln
Decide, now, that you will do whatever it takes, change whatever you need to, face whatever you need to, to be Happy, finally, in this lifetime.
Emotional Intelligence is the key to happiness.

You Gotta Feel It, to Heal It!

“The key is to not resist or rebel against emotions or to try to get around them by devising all sorts of tricks; but to accept them directly, as they are.”
- Takahisa Kora
“Instead of resisting any emotion, the best way to dispel it is to enter it fully, embrace it and see through your resistance.”
- [...]

People are our Mirror

“The people we are in relationship with are always a mirror, reflecting our own beliefs, and simultaneously we are mirrors reflecting their beliefs. So relationship is one of the most powerful tools for growth… if we look honestly at our relationships we can see so much about how we have created them.”
- Shakti Gawain

2008 Priorities

“Getting in touch with our true selves must be our first priority!”
- Tom Hopkins
—
We know nothing until we know all the ways that we’re not who we should be. Only then do we have a chance at becoming the people we’ve wanted to be, and God intended us to be, from the day we were [...]

Emotional Criticism

“Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business.”
- Norman Vincent Peale

Wanna be Heard?

Nobody cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.
– Theodore Roosevelt, 1858-1919, 26th President of the United States

It’s not the Content, it’s the Delivery!

My wife and I have an ongoing struggle about this…
You see, I get my feelings hurt, pretty easily. Because I “hear” the different inflexions in voice, energy and body language, because I believe I the “see” the rest of what is being said, I often get my feelings hurt, or get angry, at her [...]

Quotes from Famous People

“Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain’t goin’ away.”
- Elvis Presley
“I do not seek. I find.”
– Pablo Picasso
Wisdom is the supreme part of happiness.
– Sophocles
“The man who has no imagination has no wings.”
- Muhammad Ali

The ABC’s of Healthy Attitudes

void negative sources, people, places, things and habits.
Believe in yourself.
Consider things from every angle.
Don’t give up and don’t give in.
Enjoy life to the fullest!
Family and friends are hidden treasures; enjoy their company.
Give more than you are expected to.
Hang on to your dreams.
Ignore those who try to discourage you.
Just do it.
Keep trying no matter how hard [...]

Ten Ways To Do What You Love

1. Do what you love.
2. Provide a service to others who do what you love.
3. Teach others to do what you love.
4. Write about what you love.
5. Speak about what you love.
6. Create a product related to what [...]

Give yourself a Break!

“We have the need to be accepted and to be loved by others, but we cannot accept and love ourselves.
The more self-love we have, the less we will experience self-abuse. Self-abuse comes from self-rejection, and self-rejection comes from having an image of what it means to be perfect and never measuring up to [...]

I Like My Job

George Carlin sayz, “My job is to think up goofy shit, come back here, and report it to you!”
I say, “My job is feel emotional shit, and come back here, and report it to you!”

Awareness is the First Key to Change

“Insight occurs when, and to the degree that, one knows oneself.”
- Andrew Schneider
————————————————————-
“We are not what we know. We are what we are willing to learn.”
- Council on Ideas
————————————————————-
“The ultimate value of life depends upon awareness and the power of contemplation rather than upon mere survival.”
- Aristotle

Failure to Launch

Failure = inability to manage and control your own self, your own body, your own feelings
Failure = losing the battle with your inner demons
Failure = letting your fears and your stress take over your life and beat you down
Failure = allowing the unresolved feelings from your past to ruin your present, and your future
Failure = [...]

How Judging Yourself and Others Can Ruin Your Live

How Judging Yourself and Others Can Ruin Your Live
By
Bernadine Glori Celis
I made a big revelation this week. I became aware of how much my judgments were affecting the way I felt about others and myself. I have been in counseling and support groups for many years of my life. I am now 48 years old. [...]

Turn Barriers Into Bridges

Only the person who never gives up in life, who persists with his wish to find and fulfill the promise of himself, makes this truly self-liberating discovery: those places that he once mistook as being impassible barriers to his happiness become as bridges to the same, but only if he learns to welcome them as [...]

Know Yourself!

“Knowing others is wisdom; knowing the self is enlightenment.”
- Tao Te Ching
“What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself”
- Abraham H. Maslow

Know God

The idea of God is different in every person. The joy of my recovery was to find God within me.
- Angela L. Wozniak
Tho’ we don’t preach, or even teach, about God much, getting closer to yourself – finding your inner peace and removing your blocks to intimacy – allows you to Experience your God to [...]

Inspire Me

“I learned… that inspiration does not come like a bolt, nor is it kinetic, energetic, striving, but it comes to us slowly and quietly and all the time, though we must regularly and every day give it a little chance to start flowing, prime it with a little solitude and idleness.”
- Brenda Ueland
Not for me. [...]

The Season

“The truth is that for all the stress surrounding this season, it’s kind of exhilarating when you finally do find just the right present for someone we love, or our home-cooked meal gets oohs and aahs at the table, or we walk through our family’s front door as a grown-up who actually knows our own [...]

In Control

“The most self-destructive thought that any person can have is thinking that he or she is not in total control of his or her life.
- Roger Dawson
No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change. [...]

Thanks!

“What if you gave someone a gift, and they neglected to thank you for it–would you be likely to give them another?
Life is the same way. In order to attract more of the blessings that life has to offer, you must truly appreciate what you already have.”
- Ralph Marston
Give thanks for all [...]

Should I, or Should I not?

“Most people are so busy knocking themselves out trying to do everything they think they should do, they never get around to do what they want to do.”
- Kathleen Winsor
Bad Shoulds = those that stick in our heads, usually in someone else’s voice but that we don’t want to do… or don’t even [...]

You Are All You Need to Be!

“Everything you need you already have. You are complete right now, you are a whole, total person, not an apprentice person on the way to someplace else.”
- Wayne Dyer
“Who you really are is enough.”
- Oriah Mountain Dreamer
“Wherever you are is always the right place. There is never a need to fix anything, to hitch up [...]

Leo Buscaglia, A Tribute

Only when we give joyfully, without hesitation or thought of gain, can we truly know what love means.
– Leo Buscaglia, 1924-1998, American Author and Expert on Love and Human Relationships
This is a loving tribute to one of the greatest teachers of LOVE and living Life to the fullest. A Cheerleader for Life!
Leo B. [...]

EI101.com

Just so you’ll know (and it’s easier to refer your friends, hint, hint):
We’re now EI101.com
This site can now be reached using the address http://www.EI101.com. My intention is to write an emotional intelligence training course called EI101… and follow it with EI102, EI201, EI301 & EI401… all of which I recently registered.
stay tuned! [...]

Are you Teachable?

“The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.”
- Alvin Toffler
Part of Emotional Intelligence is about learning about our past, how and what we learned from our parents and our childhood, and how all that still effects us today, both consciously [...]

Emotional Intelligence and the 3 Little Pigs

Here’s an interesting article about how Emotional Intelligence, and the study of engineering, can be likened to the story of the 3 little pigs. Very well done… read on.
http://www.e-ii.org/3b.asp
- Matt

Change Myself

We are absolutely powerless to change others,
but we are absolutely powerful to change ourselves.
- Doc Downing

Full Range of Emotions

“When you are able to contain both your light and dark together, that is a very enlightening state. It means that you no longer have to choose one experience over another. You do not have to choose love OR hate, blame OR forgiveness, sadness OR joy, anger OR openheartedness. You are no [...]

Beyond Beliefs

Are you ready to shift some of your core beliefs about who you are and how you fit into the world?
Emotional Intelligence is the answer.

Little You vs. Big You

What would the child you once were think of the person you are today?
Would your inner child like your outer adult?
list your answer in a comment, below.

Emotional Intelligence can Hurt!

Self-knowledge and self-improvement are very difficult for most people. It usually needs great courage and long struggle.
- Dr. Abraham Maslow
It’s true. Emotional growth can be damned uncomfortable! By definition, trying something new and pushing yourself to new heights is gonna be awkward, uneasy, even painful and unpleasant at times.
Get used to [...]

Be Honest with Yourself

Our relationship with ourselves is the most important relationship we need to maintain. The quality of that relationship will determine the quality of all our other relationships.

When we can tell ourselves how we feel, and accept our own feelings, we can be real with others.
When we can accept what we want and need, we will [...]

Don’t Give Up!

Often the difference between a successful person and a failure
is not one has better abilities or ideas,
but the courage that one has to bet on one’s ideas,
to take a calculated risk – and to act.
- Andre Malraux
I know quite certainly that I myself have no special talent;
curiosity,
obsession
& dogged [...]

Big People

“Really big people are, above everything else, courteous, considerate and generous –
not just to some people in some circumstances –
but to everyone all the time.”
- Thomas J. Watson, Sr.
Why? Because it FEELS GOOD to be courteous, considerate and generous!
Try it. It’s fun!

What Are Feelings For?

What is the purpose of our Feelings & Emotions?
(leave your answer in a comment below)

All Feelings are Good!

“What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it.”
– Jiddu Krishnamurti

“All feelings are good!”

- Cal Banyan

Emotional Choices

“Freedom of choice is more to be treasured than any possession earth can give.”
- David O. McKay
Right on, David!
and Emotional Intelligence gives you MORE CHOICES on how you react and how you behave and how you SUCCEED!

“What man wants is simply independent choice, whatever that may cost and wherever it may lead.”
- Fyodor [...]

Emotional Awareness

Awareness is the first key to all change!
“Relative to the level of awareness that is possible for us, our ordinary state of consciousness is as far from a direct experience of reality as sleep is from waking consciousness.”
– Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson
“The thought ‘I exist’ is not the same thing as [...]

What is Happiness?

I liked this article and thought it was a very good way of explaining what Happiness is…
“I have found that happiness is not something we look for and not something that is “out there” or out of our reach. Rather, it is about being present with what IS. It is about being grateful for what [...]

Emotional Safety

Creating Emotional Safety within an aware, loving group of people is one of the most amazing feelings one can possibly experience, and one of the very BEST ways to heal, quickly and effectively!
“A group of humans becomes healing and converting only after its members have learned to stop trying to heal and convert. Community is [...]

10 Steps to Unlocking “The Secret”

Here are some steps to take to get more Abundance into your life:
1. Clear Your Mind
2. Decide What You Want
3. Ask For It
4. Visualize Having It
5. Express and Feel Gratitude
6. Let Go of Control
7. Stay Positive
8. Be Patient
9. Invite It In
10. Share the Wealth
by Rhonda herself (I think).

Translating

I’ve found that the Language of Emotional Intelligence is different than regular English, spoken on the streets and in our homes and workplaces.
People say things like:
“I feel…”
“I believe…”
“How am I not being clear?”
“I hear you.”
“I’m listening.”
“How can I be clearer so you’ll understand better?”
and the language of the more Advanced EQ is about Translating what [...]

The Other Energy Crises, by Jon Gordon

The Other Energy Crises

Powerful article on how emotional intelligence (EQ) in the workplace, again, is more important than IQ!

“Today’s employees are under-engaged, overtired and overstressed.

The fact is that enhanced energy, success and performance cannot be found in a can of Red Bull or a cup of espresso. Instead of being energy drainers, American businesses must [...]

Be a Great Leader – Know yourself and your Peeps

All great leaders have one characteristic in common – they have a high degree of Emotional Intelligence.
- Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence, 1995

Emotional Success, the movie

Personal Success
- a young dude, maybe 17 or 18. hand on door, to step inside — himself!
- – show him reliving certain childhood events that were big for him, emotionally,
- – – watch him stuff his feelings, and deny them, and gloss over them
- – – – then watch his unresolved feelings transform [...]

Animator vs Animation

Check out this movie… just for fun… very clever!  Enjoy.  – Matt
The Animator vs. his Animationhttp://alanbecker.deviantart.com/art/Animator-vs-Animation-34244097
Animator vs. Animation by *alanbecker on deviantART

You are not alone!

Our first and last love is – self-love.
- Bovee
It’s all about you! It’s all about love. It’s all about you, loving you.
If you cannot, or do not, love yourself, how can you ask someone else to do something you are unwilling to do?
Find love for yourself within yourself. Ask your Higher [...]

F.E.A.R.

Does my Fear control me, or do I control my Fear?
As always, I have some choices in how handle my Fear?
Do I:
Fight Everything And Run
&nbsp&nbsp or
Face Everything And Recover
I try to go towards my emotional Fears, not away from them. I will no longer be afraid of my own feelings. My fear is [...]

Super-Learning Mode

"Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can – there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did."
- Sarah Caldwell

Learning is fun.  Learning is free (usually).  Learning is life.  Learn-learn-learn!
My favorite clients/friends are in what I call "Super-Learning Mode".  It’s a state, often immediately following a [...]

Is it all just a fancy Sales pitch?

I believe some think I sound like I’m ‘hawking my wares’, trying to Sell people on these powerful emotional intelligence concepts… that’s ’cause I am! 
I don’t know how else to put it so that people will believe me to the point that they will go inside themselves to make the difficult, sometimes painful, changes [...]

I’m Scared.

I’m really scared.  I’m scared that people are hurting out there, and we have some keys to healing, but they don’t know that, and keep on hurting because of us.  Because of our inability to sum it up, and get the point across.  succinctly, powerfully and life-changingly.
We don’t even have much for sale.We’re not [...]

Make People Feel Important

"Pretend that every single person you meet has a sign around his or her neck that says, Make Me Feel Important. Not only will you succeed in sales, you will succeed in life."
- Mary Kay Ash

Pay Attention to your Emotions!

"Emotions are the next frontier to be understood and conquered. To manage our emotions is not to drug them or suppress them, but to understand them so that we can intelligently direct our emotional energies and intentions…. It’s time for human beings to grow up emotionally, to mature into emotionally managed and responsible citizens. No [...]

Processing your Feelings

"Spiritual progress is like detoxification. Things have to come up in order to be released. Once we have asked to be healed, then our unhealed places are forced to the surface." – Marianne Williamson
We call it "Processing your Feelings".  We find them, we acknowledge them, we allow them, we FEEL them, we release them [...]

Fear can ruin your life!

Fear defeats more people than any other one thing in the world.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

As I’ve said many times before, I believe that FEAR has ruined more lives, and more relationships, than anger has! Fear is sneeky. Fear is quiet. Fear is subtle. Anger is LOUD and obvious and usually obnoxious. You can easily tell [...]

Happiness

"Happiness is an inside job."
– William Arthur Ward

Showing Feelings

"Never apologize for showing feelings. When you do so, you apologize for the truth."

– Benjamin Disraeli, 1804-1881, British Statesman and Literary Figure

"Be an all-out, not a hold-out."
- Norman Vincent Peale

You know how people are often trying to Hide their feelings from others?? Well, much of the time, I actually WANT people to know [...]

Feelings are the truth

If you don’t live in your feelings, you don’t live in the real world.  Feelings are the truth.  What you do with them will decide whether you live in honesty or by a lie.  Using defenses to try to manage feelings may distort your perception of the truth, but it does not alter the truth.  [...]

Fear and Passion

All men should strive to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.
- James Thurber

I don’t get angry, I get even (a joke)

Here is a great definition of Passive-Aggressive Behavior. I think this is also a good example of: I don’t get angry, I get even.
CURTAIN RODS—- PRICELESS
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
On the third [...]

Kindness and Wisdom

Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate.
– Albert Schweitzer, 1875-1965, Alsatian Theologian/Musician/Medical Missionary

A clever person solves a problem. A wise person avoids it.
– Albert Einstein, 1879-1955, German-born American Physicist

It doesn’t take any time or money to be kind.
- mcp

Change: It’s Worth The Risk

"Change. It has the power to uplift, to heal, to stimulate, surprise, open new doors, bring fresh experience and create excitement in life. Certainly it is worth the risk."
- Leo Buscaglia

“I can change. I can live out my imagination instead of my memory. I can tie myself to my limitless potential instead of my [...]

Find Peace Within You

“Practice silence and you will acquire silent knowledge. In this silent knowledge is a computing system that is far more precise and far more accurate and far more powerful than anything that is contained in the boundaries of rational thought.”
- Deepak Chopra

Emotional Results

Commit to yourself that you will persue a course of Emotional Intelligence and understanding.
Give it a few years (2-4) and I guarentee results.  massive, life-enhancing, incredible results.
Depending on how deep and ingrained your "issues" are, it may take as many as 5 or even 7 years. 
but so what? do you have something More [...]

Cool Quote, again

Manifesting dreams has never been easier, not once in all eternity, than it will be during the rest of your life.
Nor has it been easier for anyone who’s ever lived, than it now is for you.
- The Universe | www.Tut.com

2 Cool Quotes

The best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.

– Harry S. Truman, 1884-1972, 33rd President of the United States

Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with No Loss of Enthusiasm.
–Winston Churchill, 1874-1965, English Politician/Author/Nobel Prize Winner

Feeling Safe

“Oh the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are — chaff and grain together — certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with the breath [...]

Books on Emotional Intelligence

(all text below was extracted from verbiage found on Amazon.com to describe these books. I ordered all 5.)
Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child by John Gottman
The authors identify a five-step "emotion coaching" process to help teach children how to recognize and address their feelings, which includes becoming aware of the child’s emotions; recognizing that dealing [...]

Say it in any language, just Say it!

Tell your friends.  Tell your family.  Tell your co-workers.  even tell your boss (if appropriate).  Imagine leaving this earth without having told all the people you love how you really feel!

English I Love You

Spanish Te Amo

French Je T’aime

German lch Liebe Dich

Japanese Ai Shite Imasu
Thai   Phom rak khun   Italian Ti amo

Chinese [...]

Name your emotions, so you can tame them

Brain scans reveal why meditation works
(LiveScience)http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/world/2007-07/03/content_908252.htm
"If you name your emotions, you can tame them, according to new research that suggests why meditation works.
Brain scans show that putting negative emotions into words calms the brain’s emotion center. That could explain meditation’s purported emotional benefits because people who meditate often label their negative emotions in [...]

High Emotional Intelligence v. Low Emotional Intelligence

Examples of High v. Low EQ————————–chill v. tensionpatience v. stressacting (non-reacting) v. reactinghurry without rushingpersistance v. flitting aboutgiving in v. giving uplistening v. yappingventing v. dumping uponyour own shoulds v. other people’s shouldspersonal responsibility v. blaming / victimknowing what you can control v. what you cannotknowing what’s your problem v. what’s NOT your problemmeditating v. [...]

Conquering Fear

"You can conquer almost any fear if you will only make up your mind to do so. For remember, fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in the mind."
- Dale Carnegie

Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real

Emotional Awareness

"The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names. "
– Chinese Proverb

—
"Emotional awareness is the first key to change."
- mcp

—
"Our lives improve only when we take chances – and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves."
- Walter Anderson

Building a Healthy Self-Esteem

Building a Healthy Self-Esteem (article) http://www.happynews.com/news/672007/building-healthy-self-esteem.htm
Here’s a good article on being "real" with your kid. Positive, definitely. Over-Positive, no. (but over-positive still beats over-negative!).  Here are some excerpts from this article so you’ll get the point…

"Few things are more important to a child’s personal growth than having a healthy self-esteem.
We help our children have [...]

Hiding Feelings From Yourself

"One of the greatest moments in anybody’s developing experience is when he no longer tries to hide from himself but determines to get acquainted with himself as he really is."
- Norman Vincent Peale

The Beauty of Having Choices

A good anger acted upon is beautiful as lightning and swift with power.A good anger swallowed clots the blood like slime.
-Marge Piercy

—
"One thing we can do is make the choice to view the world in a healthy way. We can choose to see the world as safe with only moments of danger rather than seeing [...]

Compassion

"Compassion is the ultimate and most meaningful embodiment of emotional maturity.
It is through compassion that a person achieves the highest peak and deepest reach in his or her search for self-fulfillment."

- Arthur Jersild

Benefits of Emotional Intelligence (2)

"Does emotional intelligence help boost sales, improve customer satisfaction, reduce turnover, increase safety, and enhance productivity?"
by Joshua Freedman, EQ Teacher, extraordinaire!

.
Sales
When I ask sales people in all kinds of businesses for the key to their effectiveness, the first answer is "relationships." So if emotional intelligence is essential to building good relationships, and good relationships are [...]

It’s Official…

.

EQ > IQ  !!

.

Contentment

"The world is full of people looking for spectacular happiness while they snub contentment."
- Doug Larson

right on!  Contentment is a Wonderful thing!  It seems like it takes older age to appreciate the true value in Contentment, to know that it can be the worthiest of goals.

It doesn’t always have to be Exciting… it’s [...]

Let Go, Let God

"When we know that love matters more than anything, and we know that nothing else REALLY matters, we move into the state of surrender. Surrender does not diminish our power, it enhances it."
- Sara Paddison

… and, some of the bravest acts I’ve ever witnessed were those of total Surrender.
It takes incredible Emotional Strength (high [...]

Emotional Intelligence Defined

emotional intelligence
n.
Intelligence regarding the emotions, especially in the ability to monitor one’s own or others’ emotions.

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2003.

Purpose Brings Joy

"There is no more important step you can take than to define your life’s purpose. It develops your sense of belonging to our universe."
– Arnold Patent

We ALL need some sense of belonging… with each other, with ourselves, with the earth.  Who are you and what do you bring to the world?
So, what’s YOUR [...]

Personal Responsibility is a Key

"It doesn’t matter how you come to it…just that you do: Finally recognize that no one is responsible for your life but you."
- Oprah Winfrey

If you blame, whine, complain and otherwise victimize yourself, you are giving your power away.  Take control of your own life by taking full responsibility for who you are, what [...]

PHILOSOPHY IN PSYCHOTHERAPY with ALBERT ELLIS, Ph.D.

Below is an interview with Albert Ellis, Ph.D.  Please read it thru, or at least skim it.  It is the clearest, most profound explanation I’ve seen about how Human Behaviour works, including the feelings and emotions behind all that we do.
Some of Dr. Ellis’s basic premises:

"The main thing is to accept responsibility for what you [...]

Are you a Believer or a Doubter?

"If you expect the best, you will be the best.
Learn to use one of the most powerful laws in this world; change your mental habits to belief instead of disbelief. Learn to expect, not to doubt. In so doing, you bring everything into the realm of possibility."
- Dr. Norman Vincent Peale

Stop and [...]

Take Time To Trust

Oftentimes leaders attempt to quantify or qualify the time they spend with their staff or even their children!  We hear, “I invested hours of quality time to train that individual”, or “It takes years of dedicated training to produce a worthy employee”, or even “I’m such an awesome leader that I don’t even need to [...]

Loving Yourself

"It is not selfish or narcissistic to love yourself. It is your first and foremost responsibility."
- Alan Cohen

Facing Fear

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of [...]

Say YES to Life!

"The indispensable first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: decide what you want."
- Ben Stein
…and picture it, and ask for, and see yourself having it.- The Secret  http://www.TheSecret.TV
————————————————————-
"You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage — pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically — to say [...]

Compassion and Understanding

"When we experience the pain of another person, we instinctively want to take away that pain. But by taking away the other person’s pain, we also take away his or her opportunity to grow. To be truly compassionate, we must be able to share another person’s suffering and pain — knowing there is nothing [...]

Emotional Myths

Myth 1: Emotions are more primitive than reason. Emotions originate in the brain just like reason, even though you might feel them in your heart or in your gut. They are equally valid when making decisions, the key to making informed decisions it to consult both sides of your brain.
Myth 2: Clamping down on [...]

Self-Evaluation

Emotional Intelligence Self-Evaluation Assessment
Measures:

Emotional Awareness
Managing One’s Emotions
Self-Motivation
Empathy
Coaching Others’ Emotions

Take the 30-question test here:
http://ed.swau.edu/England/handouts/emotional_intelligence_self-evaluation.pdf

Feelings are the Key!

"With just a little education and practice on how to manage your emotions, you can move into a new experience of life so rewarding that you will be motivated to keep on managing your emotional nature in order to sustain it. The payoff is delicious in terms of improved quality of life."
- Doc Childre [...]

Benefits of Emotional Intelligence

1. Better communication skills
Powerful, not wimpy. Strong and able to be tough, without being Cold. With personal Boundaries and the strength and tools to uphold them.

2. Heightened Self-Awareness

"Depression is Anger turned Inward."
"When we feel Guilty, we’ll set ourselves up to be Punished."
"Negative emotions, expressed verbally as intensely as they are felt, will take place [...]

Quotes on Guilt (2)

"If we don’t forgive ourselves for our mistakes, and others for the wounds they have inflicted upon us, we end up crippled with guilt. And the soul cannot grow under a blanket of guilt, because guilt is isolating, while growth is a gradual process of reconnection to ourselves, to other people, and to a larger [...]

Quotes on Sadness

"To weep is to make less the depth of grief."
- William Shakespeare

"When the heart grieves over what it has lost, the spirit rejoices over what it has left."
- Sufi epigram

"There is no despair so absolute as that which comes with the first moments of our first great sorrow, when we have not [...]

How to be Happy

Remember the five simple rules to being Happy:
     1. Free your heart from hatred.     2. Free your mind from worries.     3. Live simply.     4. Give more.     5. Expect less.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness IS NOT:
1) A sense of false humility that makes us better than somebody else
2) Condoning ignorant or harmful behavior
3) Any one specific set of "right" behaviors
4) A "spiritual" evasion of real grief work.
Forgiveness IS:

1) A deep psycho-spiritual process capable of honing our wisdom
2) An attitude that sets us [...]

John Bradshaw

John Bradshaw is one of my biggest heros, and has personally made a huge difference in my growth and healing…
See a list of his many works here.
Thanks, John!

Feeling Verbs

Here’s some of the verbs I’ve heard about what we do with our Feelings & Emotions:

Get in touch with your feelings
Manage your emotions
Get a handle on your feelings
Get a grip on yourself
Calm down
Mellow out
Chill, take a chill pill
Relax and enjoy
Take a break
Find inner peace
Deal with your inner child
CHAMPION your inner child  (john bradshaw)
Anger Management
Take control [...]

Anger Resources

Healthy Anger: How to Help Children and Teens Manage Their Anger
Anger, when properly understood, tells more about wants and needs than about the person or situation that has caused the anger.
Getting Control of Your Anger: A Clinically Proven, Three-Step Plan for Getting to the Root of the Problem and Resolving It Robert Allan
Dr. Allan’s [...]

Depression Help

Help with Depression

http://www.depression.com/getting_support.html

MoodGYM: Depression help, CBT re: depresseion, no charge. has characters!
http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/

Depression Questionnaire 16 multiple choice questions, no assessment
http://www.depression.com/depression_questionnaire.html

Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance(formerly the National Depressive and Manic-Depressive Association )730 North Franklin, Suite 501Chicago, IL 60601-7204Toll-free: (800) 826-3632E-mail: chapters@dbsalliance.org
http://www.dbsalliance.org/

National Alliance for the Mentally Ill (NAMI)Colonial Place Three2107 Wilson Boulevard, Suite 300Arlington, VA 22201-3042Toll-free: (800) 950-NAMI [...]

I’d like to Teach the world to Sing (but not in perfect harmony).

I want to teach the world the incredible power of basic Emotional Intelligence skills (EQ skills).
Teach people to imagine.to visualize.to plan.to conjure.to ask for.to attract.to believe.to trust.to love.
to be open.  or not.to feel.  or not.
to allow.to create.to receive.to give.to play.to laugh.to sing.to dance.to scream.to cry.
to emote.  honestly, without drama.to make boundaries.to teach others how to [...]

Emotional Intelligence is the key to Happiness and Success!

If you know what to Expect from yourself, you’re in control.
If you have no idea what you’re gonna do next, you’re Out of Control.
If you don’t Understand yourself, don’t Know yourself, don’t know what to Expect from yourself, how can you be successful at anything?!?  How can anyone count on you?  How can you count [...]

The Secret Movie 30 Day Challenge

Make a commitment NOW to make the next month, March 2007, a month of real, quantifiable change and growth in your life!
Take the 30 day challenge, based on the life-changing movie The Secret, and "manifest" something New and DIFFERENT and Cool in your life, now.
Link: The Secret Movie 30 Day Challenge.  (lead by an amazing [...]

The EQ Edge

The appearance in 1995 of Daniel Goleman’s Emotional Intelligence: Why it can Matter More than IQ generated a flood of interest in the role that emotional intelligence plays in our lives. Goleman elegantly surveyed years of research into psychological functioning and interpersonal skills, presenting his case to general readers in a coherent and accessible way. [...]

Quotes on Fear

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but the conquering of it.  Your fears are not walls, but hurdles."
- Dan Millman

"Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them."
- Brendan Francis

“It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to [...]

Creatures of Emotion

"When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but creatures of emotion."
- Dale Carnegie

Feelings and Emotion Defined

Research on "Feelings"View results from: Dictionary | Thesaurus | Encyclopedia | All Reference | the Web
—Synonyms: Feeling, emotion, passion, sentiment refer to pleasurable or painful sensations experienced when one is stirred to sympathy, anger, fear, love, grief, etc.
—————-Research on "Emotion"View results from: Dictionary | Thesaurus | Encyclopedia | All Reference | the Web

- an affective [...]

Asking for Help

The healthy, the strong individual, is the one who asks for help when he needs it. Whether he has an abscess on his knee or in his soul.
- Rona Barrett

Asking for help does not mean that we are weak or incompetent. It usually indicates an advanced level of honesty and intelligence.
- Anne [...]

The Secret, a movie – Watch it!

Watch the movie, The Secret. imho, one of the best personal growth movies of all time (in the same arena as ‘What the Bleep’).
http://www.TheSecret.TV $4.95, 90 minutesTrailer version, 2 min: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1443364536882886742
"Who you are today is a sum total of what you have ALREADY thought and felt." – Jack Canfield, "Chicken Soup for the Soul"
"Imagination [...]

Super Bowl Feelings

Well, it was a GREAT Game!  Hard fought, exciting, interesting.
And I was real Happy with how well everyone behaved.  The words "Love" and "God" were used a lot, and there was an upbeat, family-like warmth amongst both the players and coaches.  Even the commercials were pretty upbeat and feelings-conscious.
I watched the game with 7 kids [...]

Showing Feelings

Pink Floyd, The Wall"The Trial"
(barrister)Good morning worm, your honor.the crown will plainly show the prisoner who now stands before you,was caught red-handed showing feelings.showing feelings of an almost human nature.
THIS WILL NOT DO.
call the schoolmaster…
(schoolmaster)I always said you’d come to no good in the end, your honor.if they would have had my way I could [...]

Thoughts on Anger (5)

Violating Anger vs. Liberating Anger
Violating Anger:Speak about "you"Comes from a feeling of PowerlessnessHas a twistManipulates the truthHas a hidden agendaAttacks to hurtBlames and proves "guilt"Is a weaponSeeks to discredit the other as a personHas no accountabilityHides behind innocenceIs righteously superiorAssumes another’s motivesNeeds a villainRefuses to claim anythingSeeks to punishUses information to make a case against [...]

#1 Top Life Skills

#1 Most Powerful Interpersonal Communication Skill:
Shut Up and Listen

#1 Most Important Relationship in Life:
Your relationship with Yourself

#1 Best Thing you can do for you and your family’s Present and Future:
Increase your Emotional Intelligence

#1 Deepest, most life-trashing, relationship-blasting, sex-ruining, self-esteem-bashing, hopeless event we can experience:
Being molested or violated as a child.

#1 Worst thing about trying [...]

Quotes on Success (2)

"He who has achieved success has worked well, laughed often and loved much."
– Elbert Hubbard
"Too often, people focus only on results. But getting results without learning something or without having fun are incomplete. Accomplishment is all three: the result, personal growth and having fun."
– Peter L. Hirsch
"There are many aspects to [...]

Feelings Toward Yourself

"It’s surprising how many persons go through life without ever recognizing that their feelings toward other people are largely determined by their feelings toward themselves, and if you’re not comfortable within yourself, you can’t be comfortable with others."
– Sydney J. Harris
Yep, it’s all about YOU!

How People Work

Here’s how we got to be who we are, and why we do what we do…
Event -> Meaning -> Feeling -> Behaviour

EVENT: Shit happens.  Sometimes really bad stuff, especially to little kids.stuff happen to us, around us, thru us, between us.
MEANING: We try to make sense of it … "I am bad",  "I am small [...]

Relationships and Money

hard to believe, but it’s true…
"All the money you’ve ever made,and all the money you will ever make,will come from a Relationship.The key is to focus on the Quality of your Relationships."
- jr@well.com

Playing your Heart out!

"I believe in playing with your heart, with every fiber in your body — fairly, squarely, by the rules–to win. And I believe that any man’s finest moment, the greatest fulfillment of all he holds dear, is that moment when he has worked his heart out and lies exhausted on the floor of battle — [...]

Take Control of your Life!

"The difference between great people and everyone else is that great people create their lives actively, while everyone else is created by their lives, passively waiting to see where life takes them next. The difference between the two is the difference between living fully and just existing."
- Michael E. Gerber
heck yeah!thanks, Kristin for the Morning [...]

Contribution to Peace

I contribute to peace…  (author unknown)
I contribute to Peace when I strive to express the best of myself in my contacts with others.
I contribute to Peace when I use my intelligence and my abilities to serve the Good.
I contribute to Peace when I feel compassion toward all those who suffer.
I contribute to Peace when I [...]

Quotes on Guilt

Guilt "When guilt rears its ugly head confront it, discuss it and let it go. The past is over. It is time to ask what did we do right, not what did we do wrong. Forgive yourself and move on."
- Bernie S. Siegel

"I have made it a rule of my life never to [...]

No More Wars (2)

"War" is a mighty strong word… but it’s a strong message, too.
Ok, we’re going to war.  We wage a:war against Shoulds.war against perfection.war against harshness, and cruelty, and unnecessary pain.war against emotional ignorance and cluelessness.war against separateness and isolation and making enemies.war against aloneness and loneliness.war against rage, replaced with good clean anger.war against depression, [...]

No More Wars (1)

Free Yourself from Emotional Prison!
(see Mr. Einstein’s quote that I posted yesterday.)he said:
"Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."

it’s not a war, it’s a liberation.it’s not a fight, it’s a release.it’s not [...]

No More Wars

-There will never be another world war — ever!
In fact, I believe wars will decline in the future, both in severity and in number.
I believe that we, as a planet, are slowly, but surely, "Getting It", and I’m very happy about that!
I have hope for the future.  I believe we are on the right path [...]

EQ Rocks!

More Happiness, Less Humbug -Strategies To Beat The Holiday Blahs
http://www.eqatwork.com/eqblog/?p=55
Joseph Liberti, founder of EQ At Work

Free Yourself from Emotional Prison

"A human being is a part of the whole, called by us the ‘Universe’, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest – a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to [...]

Positive Feelings

"Heartfelt positive feelings create far more than a healthy psychological effect.  They fortify our internal energy systems and nourish the body right down to the cellular level.  For that reason, we like to think of these emotions as quantum nutrients."
- Doc Childre and Howard Martin

and, a good one for me…
"Better to write for yourself and [...]

The 3 Parts of our Brains

(i thought this was fascinating… the brain has 3 parts, including an Emotional center.  A good friend sent this to me so I’ll have to find out the source for you)

“Who Are You? 101 Ways of Seeing Yourself” Author – Malcolm Godwin.

Georgiades Ivanovitch Gurdjieff, the charismatic Armenian mystic & teacher, maintained that human [...]

Quotes

2 good ones…
—
"Happiness is a continuation of happenings which are not resisted."
–
R. Buckminster Fuller, 1895-1983, American Architect and Engineer

—

"I am not a genius. I’m just a tremendous bundle of experience."
–
Deepak Chopra, Indian-born Physician and Spiritual Author

< Matt's Stuff

hey, I just noticed that MANY of our 2GHers, and NDers, are Currently seeing a Therapist!so maybe we could talk to other therapists,or at least say, "hey, therapy too slow for you?""want to augment your therapy?""want to SPEED UP your therapy?""want to GO DEEPER, Faster?"
come to ND.
people who are Already doing the work.
check this out: [...]

Thoughts on Anger (4)

"Adults who are most effective in helping children manage anger model responsible management by acknowledging, accepting, and taking responsibility for their own angry feelings and by expressing anger in direct and nonaggressive ways.
When children are embroiled in an anger-arousing interaction, parents & teachers can help by listening without judging, evaluating or ordering them to [...]

Thoughts on Anger (2)

so what’s up with that?
why do I go around Pissing people off so?         is it just ’cause they pay me to?                 or do I get some perverse pleasure out of it?                         (well, I have to admit, it is [...]

Thoughts on Anger

I’m not really asking for anything.this stuff just comes to me, so I report it to you.
I have been blessed to have a ton of experience in the area of intense emotional expression — face-to-face, with pillow in hand.
In fact, I’d venture to say that after 20 years of teaching ND, I have more experienced [...]

Thoughts on Judgments

It takes no strength to be Judgmental and critical.

it takes no courage, either.
it takes no class.
it takes no style.
it takes no brains.
it takes no muscle.

Cutting someone down doesn’t make you any more equal to them.  and it doesn’t make you better than them.         in fact, it [...]

Old Age, a poem

Old age, I decided, is a gift.
I am now, probablyfor the first time in my life, the person I have alwayswanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometimes despair over my body … the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt.
And often I am taken abackby that old person that lives [...]

Laughter Yoga (again)

"God is a comedian, playing to an audience too afraid to laugh. "
- Voltaire

how sad is that?!?  and I believe it’s true.
Check out a Laughter Yoga Club near you!  Or do like I’m gonna do… start your own Laughter Yoga Club.  I just found this concept and this site yesterday, and it may very [...]

Get Psych Help

wow, you guys gotta check out this site.
they have a bunch of quizzes (which I highly recommend, because AWAREness is the first key to change!)
a Rate ‘n Review section about dif meds and techniques.
a Support Community (which we have, but you can’t have too much support.)
news and articles. (hint: use their search feature to find [...]

What if

What if our disorders are really all emotion-based.That would mean that we are totally in control of our disorders, wouldn’t it.
What if, by changing our emotions, we could actually change our body.What if by healing our emotions, we could heal our body.
and rid ourselves of dis-ease and dis-orders.
what if…

Sound Bites

—12.1 heard at ND…
it feels good to be in my skin, to be me.
I don’t think I’m all that
just a nice centered "I’m Ok".
I like being me.
I know I’m exactly where God meant me to be.
I have found a happiness that I only remember feeling a few times in my past.
I actually believe that [...]