ND in MD?

Q:  Matt and Paula, Wow, this sounds like a great weekend! What would it take, in terms of students and space to have you give a weekend workshop in Maryland? Blessings, Alison
A:  Not that much, really, Alison. Not that much, at all… [...]

Happiness Quotes

"Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket, keep it
in your own."  
—
"Happiness isn't about waiting for the storm to pass…   It's about learning
how to dance in the rain" 

Twitters Away!

Ok, sorry, I haven't been posting because I've been Twitterin' and Tweetin'.  It's fun.
follow me.  #MattPerelstein
(wow, that's a cool statement, "follow me", for that means I have somewhere to take you…  And that I do… follow me… into the depths inside us.  our feelings, our heart, our passions and our soul.)

Be Honest With Yourself!

"No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself, and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be true."

 - Nathaniel Hawthorne

"You cannot fake a relationship and feel right with yourself or anyone else. Changing yourself to fit what you think other people want doesn’t work. [...]

Inspired Living

Together, as Americans, let's create the emotional support network to teach the world that EQ > IQ. Will you help?

When you are inspired by some great purpose, some extraordinary project, all your thoughts break their bonds; your mind transcends limitations, your consciousness expands in every direction, and you find yourself in a new, great and wonderful world. [...]

EQ > IQ !!

that's it!that's what I want to say to the world…

EQ > IQ !!

High IQ is cool.High EQ is better.
Feelings are more important than thoughts.Feelings are us.Feelings can and will have more effect on our life.We are our Feelings.
And we can actually Make ourselves Smarter about our feelings…… that will effect us every second and every [...]

Propaganda

T-shirts for us, not them.
I'd like to make "stuff" – T-shirts, cups, pens, etc – with some cool sayings we have.

EQ > IQ

Feelings are Good!
Guilt is Optional.
Anger is second. What do you really feel?
Don't Eat That, find something better.
It's OK to have Boundaries.
I am not a Control Freak.
FEAR is Ok. Keep Going… [...]

The terrorists are winning…

Our country is a mess.
People feel alone.
People feel afraid.
People feel powerless.
Suicide rates are up.
The economy is bad, and getting worse.
People are really hurting.
But, I believe we can do something about it.
In general, we Americans are fairly clueless about how to handle, and manage, our Feelings & Emotions, yet…
Emotional Intelligence is the #1 key to Happiness, [...]

Let’s build the safest, most effective Emotional Support Network ever created!

10 Premises to Changing the World
1. Emotional Intelligence is the key to happiness, sanity and success in life. (EQ > IQ)
2. We all have 100% control over our choices in what we feel, and how we view the world.
3. It’s more fun if we do this life thing Together.
4. True emotional support is about [...]

Feelings are a Good Thing!

“Character isn’t inherited. One builds it daily by the way one thinks and acts, thought by thought, action by action. If one lets fear or hate or anger take possession of the mind, they become self-forged chains.”
- Helen Douglas
“Too often we underestimate how quickly our feelings are going to change because we underestimate [...]

Giving is the key!

Aspire to inspire before you expire.

Believe in Yourself

“We cannot rise higher than our thought of ourselves.”
- Orison Swett Marden
“We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us something is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience [...]

Feelings are the Key!

Helping you understand how emotions have a direct and profound effect on how well you perform on the job and in life, this book presents great techniques to advance emotional self-awareness and tips on building self-esteem and confidence.
- By Jeff Feldman and Karl Mulle (Books24×7)
Put Emotional Intelligence to Work: Equip Yourself for Success

Waving Wednesday

The #1 easiest way to bring a smile to someone’s face, with the least effort from you, is to WAVE to them. Yes, just smile a bit and move your hand back and forth, and PRESTO! you could make someone’s day.
So, it’s Waving Wednesday.
Wave to someone you don’t know.
Everyone wins.

Caring for Ourselves, first

When we truly care for ourselves, it becomes possible to care far more profoundly about other people. The more alert and sensitive we are to our own needs, the more loving and generous we can be towards others.
- Eda LeShan
Anything good for you brings out the best in you and does not force you to [...]

Anger Management Skills That Work

Anger issues affect individuals from childhood to adulthood, and it is necessary to teach anger management skills that work for every age group.
One skill that tends to help people deal with negative emotions is acupressure….
Adopting positive anger management skills might involve keeping a journal….
Removing yourself from a threatening situation might eliminate the problem….
Adopting anger [...]

Get High on Happiness

‘Knowing Thyself’ Can Lead to Happiness
Powerful tools to a joyous life are being in touch with your inner self, God, and spirituality.
Imagine you bought a new car and after six months it starts to get very sluggish. You take it to the mechanic and he recommends a good wash and wax.
“What? Are you [...]

Understanding Emotions Improves Our Food Choices

Pictures Of Hot Fudge Sundaes Arouse Emotions!
Authors Blair Kidwell, David M. Hardesty, and Terry L. Childers (all University of Kentucky) examined the “emotional intelligence” of consumers, including obese people. They found that people who made the healthiest choices had high correlations between their emotional intelligence and confidence in their emotional intelligence—what the authors call “emotional [...]

Who uses Emotional Intelligence in Business?

The answer … we all do!
Our emotions help us to adapt and make sense of situations.
The evidence that an individual’s feelings affects others and that these feelings in turn affect performance highlights the importance of being aware of and managing our emotions. Leaders, salespeople, parents – anyone concerned with their influence on others.
Individuals Are [...]

CEOs Value EQ over IQ

“How bosses train to be the best”
Generally, CEOs assume there is a certain base level of IQ among all corporate leaders. Most therefore value emotional intelligence (EQ) over IQ as a way of discriminating between great leaders. However, with a few notable exceptions, CEOs do not have a deep understanding of emotional intelligence and have [...]

To love and Be loved

There is only one happiness in life: to love and be loved.
- George Sand

Emotions

“No other personal characteristic of the Self has such a clear line of connection to the Soul than emotions.”
“Anger is a legitimate feeling and emotional expression. We can use anger to help and heal or we can use anger to manipulate and destroy. Anger can distance us from others. Anger can connect us to others. [...]

Choices

Our lives are a sum total of the choices we have made.
- Wayne Dyer
This may be new information for some folks! But it’s true that we are where we are, and who we are, due to the choices we have made in the past. We may be pleased with some of [...]

Learn to be Aware

“You can live a lifetime and, at the end of it, know more about other people than you know about yourself.”
- Beryl Markham
Who am I? What’s important to me? What do I feel strongest about? To answer this, we must first learn to become more aware of ourselves and our feelings. [...]

Spam Posts

I’m sorry, but my account it getting spammed, daily.
I’m in contact with TypePad tech support, and we’re taking every step to try to stop it, but have been unsuccessful so far.
If you’re a Feedblitz subscriber who gets an email of each past, please bear with us as we get this security breach plugged and ths [...]

Be Kind to Yourself

Perfectionism is self-abuse of the highest order.
Ann Wilson Schaef

2Get, Give!

2GiveHelp.com (proposed)
2Give, without Sacrifice
2Give, without Guilt
2Give, without Burden
you wanna REALLY enjoy your life… Give.
you wanna feel REALLY loved, and appreciated… Give.
you want to have TONS of friends, and people who know you and Like you… Give.
We can show you how…

Feelings are the Bomb!

I’m gonna make a Bold statement here…
are you ready…

Our Feelings & Emotions
are THE most important thing
in our Entire Lives!

“Feelings provide us with vital and potentially profitable information every minute of the day. This feedback from the heart, and not the head, is what ignites creative genius, keeps you honest with yourself, shapes trusting [...]

The 7 Steps to Healing our Feelings

How to Take Control of your Feelings and Emotions, One Step at a time.
By Matt Perelstein
July, 2008
Follow these 7 Simple (tho’ not Easy) steps to learn to “Deal with” your feelings & emotions, completely, effectively, and beautifully –
1 Awareness that we do Feel, a Lot: Get a Clue about the importance/depth of our feelings [...]

Do yourself a Favor!

“You cannot create experience. You must undergo it. “
- Albert Camus, 1913-1960, French Author and Philosopher
Wanna do yourself the biggest favor?
Want to give yourself the very best possible gift you can?
Get yourself to the New Directions workshop this weekend in Fresno, CA.
“Ordinarily, everything we do is in our self-interest. Everything.”
- Anthony [...]

Emotional Intelligence is the key!

Less Crazy, More Sane.
Less Different, More Same.
More Power. Less Blame.
More Joy, Less Pain.
- mcp

Emotional Intelligence can Help!

“We’re learning that emotional intelligence is an important ingredient in helping professional athletes live healthy and successful lives.”
“There is a massive correlation between high EQ skills and life success.”
- Gene Upshaw, Executive Director, National Football League NFL Players Association, Emotional Intelligence Helps NFL Players “Win at Life”
Improved EQ can help in sports, in business, in [...]

Know Thyself

The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.
- Carl Rogers
The greatest happiness is to know the source of our unhappiness.
- Dostoyevsky

You can heal your life

Awareness is the first step in healing or change.
- Louise Hay
What we think, and what we believe, is what will come true for us.
Our thoughts create our lives.
It’s that simple.
And when we get that,
we can make enormous changes.
- Louise Hay
“You can heal your life” DVD

Life Rules

Life only has 3 rules
Paradox
Life is a mystery, don’t waste time trying to figure it out
Humor
It is a strength beyond all measure.
Change
Know that nothing stays the same.
- Dan Millman, “Way of the Peaceful Warrior”

Extreme Emotional Makeover – Summer Intensive

Announcement:
We are sponsoring a powerful program this summer, to show the world how much learning and growth can happen in very short period of time!
If you are chosen, you will be given intensive therapy, life coaching, reading materials, 2 weekend workshops, emotional support, and more, to help you BLAST thru your emotional issues [...]

Happiness — it’s up to you!

“If you expect the best, you will be the best. Learn to use one of the most powerful laws in this world;
change your mental habits to belief instead of disbelief. Learn to expect, not to doubt. In so doing, you bring everything into the realm of possibility.”
- Dr. Norman Vincent Peale
“No pessimist ever [...]

Emotional Choices

Most of us have more choices, emotionally, than we ever thought possible!

“When we know that the cause of something is in ourselves, and that we (ourselves) are one of the few things in the universe that we have the right and ability to change, we begin to get a sense of the choices we really [...]

Confrontation: Everyone Hates it!

Want to get over your fear of confrontation? Learn how at Emotional Intelligence – Confronting What’s True
See also the Blog link on EQ At Work for lots of cool tools and articles re: EQ.
… and remember, and Dr. Phil says, “Attitude is Everything!”:
Victor Frankel, who faced death daily in a Nazi [...]

Laughter is good for your body!

No Joke: This Is Exercise
Laugh away ticker trouble.
from here.
University of Maryland Medical Center researchers showed 20 healthy adults two movie scenes–one from the comedy Kingpin, the other a battle scene from Saving Private Ryan–while monitoring artery function. After viewing the funny clip, the volunteers’ blood vessels dilated by 22%; they constricted by 35% after the [...]

PTSD: Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

extremely common in soldiers returning from war…
from http://www.thesoldiersproject.org
Signs of possible trouble (Service Member)
Irritability, jumpiness
Anger easily and “blow up” at loved ones or friends
Feeling hyper-alert, needing to be careful, on the watch for danger
Feeling emotionally flat, uninvolved with people, distant
Feeling you can’t relate to life around you or to the concerns [...]

Laughter Heals!

Your Brain on Laughter
How clowning around improves memory, mood, and motivation
By Thomas Crook, PhD, Prevention
“A good knee-slapper produces a chemical reaction that instantly elevates your mood, reduces pain and stress, and boosts immunity (suppressed by both stress and pain). A recent fMRI study by Allan L. Reiss, MD, and colleagues at Stanford University traced this [...]

Change Your Belief System

"All personal breakthroughs begin with a change in beliefs. So how do we change? The most effective way is to get your brain to associate massive pain to the old belief. You must feel deep in your gut that not only has this belief cost you pain in the past, but it’s costing you in [...]

Love is the Answer

“Remember, in our innermost being, we are all completely lovable because spirit is love. Beyond what anyone can make you think or feel about yourself, your unconditioned spirit stands, shining with a love nothing can tarnish.”
- Deepak Chopra
————————————————————-
“When mystics use the word love, they use it very carefully — in the deeply spiritual [...]

Attraction

“The secret of attraction is to love yourself. Attractive people judge neither themselves nor others. They are open to gestures of love. They think about love, and express their love in every action. They know that love is not a mere sentiment, but the ultimate truth at the heart of the universe.”
- Deepak Chopra [...]

Fear: How to Manage it!

When fears arise, use this quick acceptance process:
1. Acknowledge and really feel your fear without judging and criticizing yourself.
2. Ask what it’s there to tell you. Be alert for inner messages that will bring you greater understanding of the situation.
3. Be fully present. Are [...]

Find Something Positive!

“Make a game of finding something positive in every situation. Ninety-five percent of your emotions are determined by how you interpret events to yourself.”
- Brian Tracy

We’re doing it!

New office opens Thursday, May 1, as the 2GetHelp Wellness Center — Yeehaa!
MEW Foundation, Inc’s was officially declared as a Corporation by the state of California Secretary of State, and we have a federal tax ID number.
Doc Downing, PhD, LMFT, will be our first (and grandest) therapist!
We’re officially advertising for additional therapist(s) / coach(es) to [...]

Emotional Specialties

2GetHelp Wellness Center
Our new center will hereby specialize in the following:
- Depression: We have helped so many understand, fight, and win, against their depression, – going from hospital to happy – in only a year or two. This is for the girls, wives and moms of the world.
- Anger: Anger has a terrible reputation, and [...]

OMG!

Nearly 1 in 5 troops has mental problems after war service – Yahoo! News
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080418/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/troops_mental_health
WASHINGTON – Roughly one in every five U.S. troops who have survived the bombs and other dangers of Iraq and Afghanistan now suffers from major depression or post-traumatic stress, an independent study said Thursday. It estimated the toll at 300,000 or more. [...]

A new Company is Born!

As of yesterday, our new company is here to help show and tell the world about the wonders and joys of Emotional Intelligence!!
MEW Foundation, Inc.’s
2GetHelp Wellness Center
2560 West Shaw Lane, Suite 105
Fresno, CA 93711-2777
(559) 431-9995 / (559) 431-9996 (fax)
We already have a therapist on staff in the office and we’ll be getting at least [...]

You Gotta Feel It, to Heal It(2)!

“Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts.”
- Albert Einstein

The Meaning of Life

Wanna find the Meaning to life?
Wanna know the Reason we are here?
Wanna find the Answers to life’s great questions?
Look inside your heart!
When we are totally in-touch with our inner-most feelings, when we truly get to Know ourselves to the deepest depths of our soul, when we find the still and the calm that exists within, [...]

Emotional Awareness

“Mindfulness means moment-to-moment, non-judgmental awareness. It is cultivated by refining our capacity to pay attention, intentionally, in the present moment, and then sustaining that attention over time as best we can. In the process, we become more in touch with our life as it is unfolding.”
- Myla & Jon Kabat-Zinn
a.k.a. Emotional Awareness

Self-Processing

I’m coining a new term,
“Self-Processing: The art and skill of Processing yourself and “resolving” your negative feelings.
Feeling Resolution is a process. a known, understood, step-by-step process that can be replicated, and measured (well, kinda).
Issues = Unresolved feelings and emotions.
- Resolving your own personal “life issues”,
- Cleaning out your emotional “system” – [...]

I don’t sing because I’m happy; I’M HAPPY because I sing.

“I don’t sing because I’m happy; I’m happy because I sing.”
- William James, 1842-1910, American Philosopher and Psychologist
—
“Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair.”
- Kahlil Gibran, 1883-1931, Lebanese Poet and Novelist

Feeling-based Medications

Top 20 Psychiatric Prescriptions for 2005
These are the top 20 psychiatric medications by number of U.S. prescriptions dispensed in 2005.
Medication Used for… U.S. Prescriptions
1. Xanax Anxiety 34,230,000
2. Zoloft Depression, anxiety 26,976,000
3. Lexapro Depression, anxiety 24,788,000
4. [...]

Let go of past pains!

“Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding [...]

Emotional Growth

instead of Personal Growth, what if we call it Emotional Growth?
it’s more descriptive and ties back in to our area of focus.
We’re all about Feelings and Emotions.
If you don’t like yours, if you think that Feelings are a bad thing… if you’re in denial about what’s happening inside you… you may want to leave here, [...]

About Emotional Intelligence

Various definitions:
“Emotional intelligence is the ability:
to perceive emotions;
to access and generate emotions so as to assist thought;
to understand emotions and emotional knowledge;
and to reflectively regulate emotions so as to promote emotional and intellectual growth.”
Another says there are four parts:
1. Perceive or sense emotions,
2. Use emotions to assist thought,
3. Understand emotions,
4. Manage emotions.
David [...]

Have a Child’s heart, and an Adult’s mind

“What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult.”
- Sigmund Freud
ouch… and oh sooo true! that’s why I like to hang around kids better!

I have a gripe… about Happiness.

I read a quote this morning…
“Happiness comes only when we push our brains and hearts to the farthest reaches of which we are capable.”
- Leo C. Rosten
sounds good, right?
well, I say, “BULL“. I don’t buy that.
I can choose to do nothing whatsoever, and still be totally Happy and at peace. [...]

It’s up to us, baby!

As your eyes open, you’ll see that your state of health, happiness, and every circumstance of your life has been, in large part, arranged by you — consciously or unconsciously.”
- Dan Millman
—
“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest [...]

The Ultimate Freedom!

“Our ultimate freedom is the right and power to decide how anybody or anything outside ourselves will affect us.”
- Stephen Covey
————————————————————-
“Freedom is what you do with what’s been done to you.”
- Jean-Paul Sartre
————————————————————-
“One cannot make a slave of a free person, for a free person is free even in a prison.” [...]

Attitude is Everything!

“Happiness is an attitude of mind, born of the simple determination to be happy under all outward circumstances.”
- J. Donald Walters
—
The last of the human freedoms is to choose one’s attitudes.
- Victor Frankl
—
Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of character.
– Albert Einstein
—
“If a person gets his attitude toward money straight,
it will help straighten [...]

Love is about being open!

Love is about open arms. If you close your arms about love, you will find that you are left holding only yourself.
– Leo Buscaglia
Being wide open, at all times, ain’t easy, and frankly it ain’t all that smart, either. Learn how to be open, when the time is right, or even by default, [...]

I am happy.

I have a life. I make a life. every day.
I have a great job, the best I’ve ever had. I work part-time, telecommuting from home, it pays well, is challenging, important and resume-enhancing.
I run 4 businesses:
EucProducts
ND – my fave!
Computer Consulting
building 2GH
I have a 700+ post blog, and building another.
I have [...]

What is Happiness?

Happiness is an Attitude
Happiness is a Lifestyle Choice.
Happiness is a Way of Being.
Happiness is a Skill.
Happiness is an Art.
Happiness is Classy.
Happiness has Style, and Grace, and Beauty.
Happiness is Fun, and Silly, and Skippy, and having a Blast, pretty often.
Happiness is about Allowing and Releasing Negative Feelings, to get back to the Positive ones.
Happiness is about [...]

We Must Teach People How to Be with Us

Maxim for life: You get treated in life the way you teach people to treat you.
– Wayne Dyer, American Psychotherapist/Author/Lecturer
If you think badly of yourself, others will instinctively treat you badly, too. But, if you value yourself, your opinions, your heart and your mind, others will USUALLY treat you the same way.

Emotions are the next frontier!

“By starving emotions we become humorless, rigid and stereotyped; by repressing them we become literal, reformatory and holier-than-thou; encouraged, they perfume life; discouraged, they poison it.”
- Joseph Collins
————————————————————-
“Emotions are the next frontier to be understood and conquered. To manage our emotions is not to drug them or suppress them, but to understand them so that [...]

Emotional Intelligence = Taking Control of your Life!

The difference between great people and everyone else is that great people create their lives actively, while everyone else is created by their lives, passively waiting to see where life takes them next. The difference between the two is the difference between living fully and just existing.
- Michael E. Gerber
The key is a tricky balancing [...]

Get out of your own muck and help someone else!

“An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.”
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Tired of your own pain and issues? Try reaching out to help someone else!
No matter how bad it is for you, there are [...]

Create Your World

True brilliance, Matt, is not a function of understanding one’s view of the world and finding order, logic, and spirituality in it. True brilliance is understanding that your view of order, logic, and spirituality is what created your world.
And therefore you are forever capable of changing everything.
The Universe

The Bucket List

The Bucket List, starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman.
It is bittersweet because these guys are dying of cancer, but it is also comical as they go about fulfilling the items on their list of what they want to accomplish before they “kick the bucket.”
The biggest takeaway: Don’t wait, or waste, another minute! [...]

Love is a friendship caught on fire

“Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.”
- Bruce Lee !
Love really is the answer. Whatever the question, Love should [...]

DECIDE to be Happy!

“Most people are about as happy as they make up their mind to be.”
- Abraham Lincoln
Decide, now, that you will do whatever it takes, change whatever you need to, face whatever you need to, to be Happy, finally, in this lifetime.
Emotional Intelligence is the key to happiness.

You Gotta Feel It, to Heal It!

“The key is to not resist or rebel against emotions or to try to get around them by devising all sorts of tricks; but to accept them directly, as they are.”
- Takahisa Kora
“Instead of resisting any emotion, the best way to dispel it is to enter it fully, embrace it and see through your resistance.”
- [...]

People are our Mirror

“The people we are in relationship with are always a mirror, reflecting our own beliefs, and simultaneously we are mirrors reflecting their beliefs. So relationship is one of the most powerful tools for growth… if we look honestly at our relationships we can see so much about how we have created them.”
- Shakti Gawain

2008 Priorities

“Getting in touch with our true selves must be our first priority!”
- Tom Hopkins
—
We know nothing until we know all the ways that we’re not who we should be. Only then do we have a chance at becoming the people we’ve wanted to be, and God intended us to be, from the day we were [...]

Emotional Criticism

“Never react emotionally to criticism. Analyze yourself to determine whether it is justified. If it is, correct yourself. Otherwise, go on about your business.”
- Norman Vincent Peale

Wanna be Heard?

Nobody cares how much you know, until they know how much you care.
– Theodore Roosevelt, 1858-1919, 26th President of the United States

It’s not the Content, it’s the Delivery!

My wife and I have an ongoing struggle about this…
You see, I get my feelings hurt, pretty easily. Because I “hear” the different inflexions in voice, energy and body language, because I believe I the “see” the rest of what is being said, I often get my feelings hurt, or get angry, at her [...]

Quotes from Famous People

“Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain’t goin’ away.”
- Elvis Presley
“I do not seek. I find.”
– Pablo Picasso
Wisdom is the supreme part of happiness.
– Sophocles
“The man who has no imagination has no wings.”
- Muhammad Ali

The ABC’s of Healthy Attitudes

void negative sources, people, places, things and habits.
Believe in yourself.
Consider things from every angle.
Don’t give up and don’t give in.
Enjoy life to the fullest!
Family and friends are hidden treasures; enjoy their company.
Give more than you are expected to.
Hang on to your dreams.
Ignore those who try to discourage you.
Just do it.
Keep trying no matter how hard [...]

Ten Ways To Do What You Love

1. Do what you love.
2. Provide a service to others who do what you love.
3. Teach others to do what you love.
4. Write about what you love.
5. Speak about what you love.
6. Create a product related to what [...]

Give yourself a Break!

“We have the need to be accepted and to be loved by others, but we cannot accept and love ourselves.
The more self-love we have, the less we will experience self-abuse. Self-abuse comes from self-rejection, and self-rejection comes from having an image of what it means to be perfect and never measuring up to [...]

I Like My Job

George Carlin sayz, “My job is to think up goofy shit, come back here, and report it to you!”
I say, “My job is feel emotional shit, and come back here, and report it to you!”

Awareness is the First Key to Change

“Insight occurs when, and to the degree that, one knows oneself.”
- Andrew Schneider
————————————————————-
“We are not what we know. We are what we are willing to learn.”
- Council on Ideas
————————————————————-
“The ultimate value of life depends upon awareness and the power of contemplation rather than upon mere survival.”
- Aristotle

Failure to Launch

Failure = inability to manage and control your own self, your own body, your own feelings
Failure = losing the battle with your inner demons
Failure = letting your fears and your stress take over your life and beat you down
Failure = allowing the unresolved feelings from your past to ruin your present, and your future
Failure = [...]

How Judging Yourself and Others Can Ruin Your Live

How Judging Yourself and Others Can Ruin Your Live
By
Bernadine Glori Celis
I made a big revelation this week. I became aware of how much my judgments were affecting the way I felt about others and myself. I have been in counseling and support groups for many years of my life. I am now 48 years old. [...]

Turn Barriers Into Bridges

Only the person who never gives up in life, who persists with his wish to find and fulfill the promise of himself, makes this truly self-liberating discovery: those places that he once mistook as being impassible barriers to his happiness become as bridges to the same, but only if he learns to welcome them as [...]

Know Yourself!

“Knowing others is wisdom; knowing the self is enlightenment.”
- Tao Te Ching
“What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself”
- Abraham H. Maslow

Know God

The idea of God is different in every person. The joy of my recovery was to find God within me.
- Angela L. Wozniak
Tho’ we don’t preach, or even teach, about God much, getting closer to yourself – finding your inner peace and removing your blocks to intimacy – allows you to Experience your God to [...]

Inspire Me

“I learned… that inspiration does not come like a bolt, nor is it kinetic, energetic, striving, but it comes to us slowly and quietly and all the time, though we must regularly and every day give it a little chance to start flowing, prime it with a little solitude and idleness.”
- Brenda Ueland
Not for me. [...]

The Season

“The truth is that for all the stress surrounding this season, it’s kind of exhilarating when you finally do find just the right present for someone we love, or our home-cooked meal gets oohs and aahs at the table, or we walk through our family’s front door as a grown-up who actually knows our own [...]

In Control

“The most self-destructive thought that any person can have is thinking that he or she is not in total control of his or her life.
- Roger Dawson
No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change. [...]

Thanks!

“What if you gave someone a gift, and they neglected to thank you for it–would you be likely to give them another?
Life is the same way. In order to attract more of the blessings that life has to offer, you must truly appreciate what you already have.”
- Ralph Marston
Give thanks for all [...]

Should I, or Should I not?

“Most people are so busy knocking themselves out trying to do everything they think they should do, they never get around to do what they want to do.”
- Kathleen Winsor
Bad Shoulds = those that stick in our heads, usually in someone else’s voice but that we don’t want to do… or don’t even [...]

You Are All You Need to Be!

“Everything you need you already have. You are complete right now, you are a whole, total person, not an apprentice person on the way to someplace else.”
- Wayne Dyer
“Who you really are is enough.”
- Oriah Mountain Dreamer
“Wherever you are is always the right place. There is never a need to fix anything, to hitch up [...]

Leo Buscaglia, A Tribute

Only when we give joyfully, without hesitation or thought of gain, can we truly know what love means.
– Leo Buscaglia, 1924-1998, American Author and Expert on Love and Human Relationships
This is a loving tribute to one of the greatest teachers of LOVE and living Life to the fullest. A Cheerleader for Life!
Leo B. [...]

EI101.com

Just so you’ll know (and it’s easier to refer your friends, hint, hint):
We’re now EI101.com
This site can now be reached using the address http://www.EI101.com. My intention is to write an emotional intelligence training course called EI101… and follow it with EI102, EI201, EI301 & EI401… all of which I recently registered.
stay tuned! [...]

Are you Teachable?

“The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn.”
- Alvin Toffler
Part of Emotional Intelligence is about learning about our past, how and what we learned from our parents and our childhood, and how all that still effects us today, both consciously [...]

Emotional Intelligence and the 3 Little Pigs

Here’s an interesting article about how Emotional Intelligence, and the study of engineering, can be likened to the story of the 3 little pigs. Very well done… read on.
http://www.e-ii.org/3b.asp
- Matt

Change Myself

We are absolutely powerless to change others,
but we are absolutely powerful to change ourselves.
- Doc Downing

Full Range of Emotions

“When you are able to contain both your light and dark together, that is a very enlightening state. It means that you no longer have to choose one experience over another. You do not have to choose love OR hate, blame OR forgiveness, sadness OR joy, anger OR openheartedness. You are no [...]

Beyond Beliefs

Are you ready to shift some of your core beliefs about who you are and how you fit into the world?
Emotional Intelligence is the answer.

Little You vs. Big You

What would the child you once were think of the person you are today?
Would your inner child like your outer adult?
list your answer in a comment, below.

Emotional Intelligence can Hurt!

Self-knowledge and self-improvement are very difficult for most people. It usually needs great courage and long struggle.
- Dr. Abraham Maslow
It’s true. Emotional growth can be damned uncomfortable! By definition, trying something new and pushing yourself to new heights is gonna be awkward, uneasy, even painful and unpleasant at times.
Get used to [...]

Be Honest with Yourself

Our relationship with ourselves is the most important relationship we need to maintain. The quality of that relationship will determine the quality of all our other relationships.

When we can tell ourselves how we feel, and accept our own feelings, we can be real with others.
When we can accept what we want and need, we will [...]

Don’t Give Up!

Often the difference between a successful person and a failure
is not one has better abilities or ideas,
but the courage that one has to bet on one’s ideas,
to take a calculated risk – and to act.
- Andre Malraux
I know quite certainly that I myself have no special talent;
curiosity,
obsession
& dogged [...]

Big People

“Really big people are, above everything else, courteous, considerate and generous –
not just to some people in some circumstances –
but to everyone all the time.”
- Thomas J. Watson, Sr.
Why? Because it FEELS GOOD to be courteous, considerate and generous!
Try it. It’s fun!

What Are Feelings For?

What is the purpose of our Feelings & Emotions?
(leave your answer in a comment below)

All Feelings are Good!

“What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it.”
– Jiddu Krishnamurti

“All feelings are good!”

- Cal Banyan

Emotional Choices

“Freedom of choice is more to be treasured than any possession earth can give.”
- David O. McKay
Right on, David!
and Emotional Intelligence gives you MORE CHOICES on how you react and how you behave and how you SUCCEED!

“What man wants is simply independent choice, whatever that may cost and wherever it may lead.”
- Fyodor [...]

Emotional Awareness

Awareness is the first key to all change!
“Relative to the level of awareness that is possible for us, our ordinary state of consciousness is as far from a direct experience of reality as sleep is from waking consciousness.”
– Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson
“The thought ‘I exist’ is not the same thing as [...]

What is Happiness?

I liked this article and thought it was a very good way of explaining what Happiness is…
“I have found that happiness is not something we look for and not something that is “out there” or out of our reach. Rather, it is about being present with what IS. It is about being grateful for what [...]

Emotional Safety

Creating Emotional Safety within an aware, loving group of people is one of the most amazing feelings one can possibly experience, and one of the very BEST ways to heal, quickly and effectively!
“A group of humans becomes healing and converting only after its members have learned to stop trying to heal and convert. Community is [...]

10 Steps to Unlocking “The Secret”

Here are some steps to take to get more Abundance into your life:
1. Clear Your Mind
2. Decide What You Want
3. Ask For It
4. Visualize Having It
5. Express and Feel Gratitude
6. Let Go of Control
7. Stay Positive
8. Be Patient
9. Invite It In
10. Share the Wealth
by Rhonda herself (I think).

Translating

I’ve found that the Language of Emotional Intelligence is different than regular English, spoken on the streets and in our homes and workplaces.
People say things like:
“I feel…”
“I believe…”
“How am I not being clear?”
“I hear you.”
“I’m listening.”
“How can I be clearer so you’ll understand better?”
and the language of the more Advanced EQ is about Translating what [...]

The Other Energy Crises, by Jon Gordon

The Other Energy Crises

Powerful article on how emotional intelligence (EQ) in the workplace, again, is more important than IQ!

“Today’s employees are under-engaged, overtired and overstressed.

The fact is that enhanced energy, success and performance cannot be found in a can of Red Bull or a cup of espresso. Instead of being energy drainers, American businesses must [...]

Sound Bites

—12.1 heard at ND…
it feels good to be in my skin, to be me.
I don’t think I’m all that
just a nice centered "I’m Ok".
I like being me.
I know I’m exactly where God meant me to be.
I have found a happiness that I only remember feeling a few times in my past.
I actually believe that [...]

Post #500

Well, folks, this post is officially the 500th post on this blogsite!
… and the message hasn’t changed over the past 3 years (only refined a bit).  It’s still:
Emotional Intelligence is the key to Happiness and Success in your life!

You can’t Heal what you can’t Feel.If you need some help with your feelings — if you [...]

Emotions are the next frontier!

"Emotions are the next frontier to be understood and conquered. To manage our emotions is not to drug them or suppress them, but to understand them so that we can intelligently direct our emotional energies and intentions…. It’s time for human beings to grow up emotionally, to mature into emotionally managed and responsible citizens. No [...]

Faith

The opposite of Fear, I believe, is Faith.
We only seem to be afraid of what MIGHT happen in the future.- we might get hurt- we might fall- we might be left behind- etc.
We are usually NOT afraid if we believe that things are going to work out Ok. That’s called Faith.
It doesn’t mean that we [...]

Time Heals, Sometimes

"We cannot live the afternoon of life according to the program of life’s morning; for what in the morning was true may in evening become a lie."
– C.G. Jung
In other words, feelings and beliefs and conclusions we made as a child may have served us well then, but they often do NOT serve us well [...]

BELIEVE

I watched the movie Polar Express tonight… and it was beautiful.  I laughed and cried, and it was really great.  So much feeling from just a movie!
I know that may sound funny to most, but coming from a woman who doesn’t cry, especially at movies…. that means a lot.  I realized tonight that almost every [...]

Intro to L.J.

~It’s almost 2:40 am and I can’t sleep.  The past few days have been intense for me, and maybe that’s why I can’t sleep.  I have been sick, overwhelmed and busy…and in the midst of it all, I have gained a complete sense of clarity that I used to believe only happened when I asked [...]

Wisdom

"The day the child realizes that all adults are imperfect he becomes an adolescent;
the day he forgives them, he becomes an adult;
the day he forgives himself, he becomes wise."
- Aiden Nowlan

Turning Anger Into Love

It’s not:
I love you but I’m angry with you.

It’s:
I love you and I’m angry with you.

both exist at the same time. remove the anger and what’s left, the Love.—actually,
It’s not even:
I’m angry with you.

it’s more:
I’m angry with your Behaviour.

I can love you and hate your behaviours at the same time, too.

Answer this question about Feeling

How "in touch" with your Feelings are you?

When was the last time you cried?

today or yesterday

in the last week or month

in the past year

can`t remember, it`s been so long

Results

Quotes on Safety

“Oh the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are — chaff and grain together — certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with the breath [...]

praise for mcp

Love Notes from our ND class – in Fresno, CA 5/15/05
"YOU R AWESOME!"- John
"Matt, You are such a treasure.  I am soooo thrilled that you’re in my life.with love always."- Sharon
"Matt,You continue to help me grow. The gift of having you (and Paula and New Directions) in my life is more valued than I can [...]

Bold Self-Expression

"Full self-expression is, hands down, the best personal and business development strategy on the planet "
- Michael Port, coach

"When you’re fully Self-Expressed, very few people will be Neutral toward you anymore."
- Lisa Wilder, coach

A Feeling of Hope

10 of the hugest benefits people get from the ND weekend workshop.
a new understanding and appreciation for:

How powerful their feelings are/can be
The fact that everyone has them, and that’s where we Connect with others.
The newly-found sense of Personal Power, and Confidence, and Pride. The sense that I AM in control of my life, from this [...]

10 ways to live longer

Great Article
According to Forbes, below are some practical ways to live longer, healthier lives. And Yes, most have to do with FEELING better = Live Longer.  (5 out of 10 are feeling-based)
There’s even a nice little Slideshow to help make these points.1. Don’t oversleep
2. Be optimistic
3. Have more sex
4. Get a pet [...]

Let’s spread the word!

"Each one, teach one. Each one, reach one. Until all are taught."
- Mark Victor Hansen

Advanced Healing

Agree – with an underlying belief. Become aware of it and decide it is True
ex: “My Grandma’s love was the purest love I’ve ever felt.”
Reject – a belief / decide it is false
ex: “No one will ever love me.”
Transcend – it doesn’t matter if the old belief is true or false. [...]

LEARN!

Learn to Love again.
Learn to Laugh again.
Learn to Feel again.
Take Control of your Feelings & Emotions
at the
New Directions Weekend Workshop!
http://www.NewDirectionsWorkshop.com

I’ve Changed!

Since I’ve been “in touch” with my Feelings:
I’m more grounded, less frantic.
More excited, less afraid.
I’m more aware, less in the dark.
More smart, less naïve.
More calm, less scattered.

Less upset, more uplifting.
Less scattered, more flattered.
Less criticism, more encouragement.
Less pain, more Joy.
Less annoyed, more ALIVE!!

Quotes on Forgiveness

“To get to forgiveness, we first have to work through the painful experiences that require it.”
– Christiane Northrup
“We must let ourselves feel all the painful destruction we want to forgive rather than swallow it in denial. If we do not face it, we cannot forgive it.”
– Kenneth McNoll

Remember, Acceptance does not [...]

The inexpressible comfort of feeling Safe

“Oh the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are — chaff and grain together — certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with the breath [...]

What’s Wrapped Around Your Heart?

How do you keep your past relationships wrapped around your heart?
Make a list of old loves, what was cool about them (what attracted you to them), what happened (in a word or two), what you learned from that experience and then see how you feel toward each one now. Is there any residual hurt, [...]